It’s a wild, wild ride from Thanksgiving to Christmas, with so much to decorate, to buy, to wrap, to mail, to cook...and work, too! But tonight, those precious moments in firelight and candlelight round the Christmas tree, and tomorrow, when family and friends gather, will make it all worth it.
It’s all too easy for me, as the daughter of the original June Cleaver, to lose myself in recipes and shopping lists and details of the season, and sail right past the time to quiet my heart and think about what really happened to my life because of that baby born so long ago, His life already marked by the shadow of a cross, one that was meant for me.
I found that moment this morning, and thought I would share my thoughts with you. My prayer for us all today is that, once again, our hearts will be touched with the wonder of Emmanel, God With Us!
Martha
My computer screen glows
With instant information from
The other side of the world
While outside, bright against a black velvet sky
Stars sparkle, high and cold
A vague memory of the great star
That shown among them
That one night
Electric lights, at least 3,000
Creatively strung along tree and roof
Burn bravely
Our little attempt to recreate
Glory
That flooded a hillside
That one night
Muzak backgrounds
Of trumpets, harps and strings
Accompany shoppers thronging the malls
And sometimes
The whispering echo of ancient angels’ song stirs our hearts
For one brief moment with
Joy
That filled the earth
That one night
Now, we stop our schedules
And on this one night
Gather loved ones gladly
Round this lighted tree
And, looking back,
We welcome you
Sweet infant King
Knowing as wise men and shepherds could not know
The peace
The joy
The freedom
The redemption
That were born
With You
That one night
Every Christmas, I try to learn something new about the story of Jesus’ birth that will make it fresh and even more significant to me. That’s been a lot of years, for sure, but, without fail, I discover a new facet every time.
The measure of God’s love for us is a subject that seemingly has unending perspectives. This Christmas season, I realized something about that love that I never noticed before. God loves us so much that He broke the rules. I think within my concept of His holiness and goodness I had, until now, attributed some timidity to God’s personality that was really not there.
Now, before you label me some kind of heretic, you have to know that I understand completely that God can’t violate His character. He didn’t contradict who He was. It was our set of rules that he shattered when He sent His Son to earth.
Our rules stated that a virgin couldn’t conceive a child. It just didn’t happen like that. Our rules were that a King couldn’t be born in a stable. Our rules declared that once a Messiah did come to earth, He would surely be more forceful and demanding. Wouldn’t he take over and make things right immediately? Our rules would never allow the Son of God to die, especially on a torturous cross. But, if by some strange twist of fate, he did die, our rules pronounced that that was surely the end of it all.
But, God loves us too much to be contained by our trivial legalism. His ideas and plans are much deeper, much broader, much more brilliant that what we can fathom. So, he had to break through all our preconceived notions in order to rescue us from sin and from ourselves. Our rules are the things that contain Him, and prevent Him from doing what He wants in and through our lives.
In my Christmas reflections this year, I recalled attending a retreat at Mo Ranch in Hunt, Texas, over thirty years ago. One of the featured speakers was Dr. Lloyd Ogilvie, who, at the time, was pastor of Hollywood Presbyterian Church in California, and later served a number of years as Chaplain of the United States Senate. Dr. Ogilvie is a very distinguished individual with a resonant voice that, most certainly, must sound just like God’s. I have never forgotten one particular phrase that he spoke in that retreat session. He said, “If you knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that God could not fail, what would you set out to do for His Kingdom?”
Our words say one thing about God, but our rules might not bear that out. If I really understood and believed that God’s love for me was inexhaustible and that He stands behind that love with power that is immeasurable, how would I live my life differently?
In my search for something deeper and something more meaningful, that’s the challenge that God has placed before me this Christmas season. I want to begin acting like I really believe that God will not fail. I want to break the rules.
I'm beginning to understand what it feels like to be Brad Pitt. There's very little I have in common with the guy, including the fact I've never been one of People magazine's Most Beautiful People. But, both of us definitely married "up."
A few weeks back, we were in Philadelphia, where Martha was honored as one of the country's top five journalism educators. Then, yesterday, all her school's principals and vice principals invaded her classroom with balloons, flowers and hoopla, and announced to her that the University of Texas had selected her as one of the Top Ten Teachers In Texas. There are over 300,000 teachers in this state, and she was chosen as one of the top of the heap!
It's especially satisfying for me to see Martha get this award, because I suppose I know more than anyone else all that she invests into her students. The time, the patience and the effort to teach them the skills to create excellent student publications are only the beginning. She's all about the kids. Martha sees a need for hope in today's kids' lives, and everything she does and says to them is focused on bringing that to them. Teaching is her calling, and God has, this year, rewarded her faithfulness to that mission. I'm really thankful to be her husband!
A few weeks ago, we asked you to share with us ways that you’ve found to share God’s love as a family during the holiday season. We received so many great stories, and we thought it would be good to share a few of them with everyone.
“Something we do as a family to minister to others is making chicken soup! We shop for the ingredients together, prepare it and deliver it together. My mother did this, too, and I wanted to pass it along to my children. My mom used to make everything homemade, like bread, and dessert, too. Well, I still make the soup, but we buy the dessert and bread at Costco and I don't feel guilty in the least!”
This contribution was from someone who works with a ministry that organized this outreach to the needy...
“We asked churches to put together bags of hygiene products to give to local homeless shelters. The packets contained full size shampoo, bar of soap and soap dish, brush, comb, toothpaste, toothbrush, lotion and deodorant. The idea was that each ‘guest’ at a shelter could receive his or her own packet of products to clean up with. Each packet also contained a Bible and a package of underwear. We asked participants to buy the underwear in the size of the individual making the packet. We got many responses from parents who said that they had a wonderful time as a family shopping for the items for the packet, and how it impacted their children to put ‘child size’ underwear into those packets The kids would have an understanding that there were children their age and size that didn’t have a home or bed. Many said that they were planning to continue to do these packets on a quarterly basis, picking up a few items every time they went shopping and making the packets together as a family to take to the shelter!”
“Every year, my dad and I would participate in a soup kitchen together. At first, I was uneasy and uncertain, but I began to model his confidence and compassion and was able to focus on serving and those being served. Our whole family was part of a mass-assembly of thanksgiving dinner bags. We worked with several other families to make sure that each bag had a frozen turkey and all the necessary fixin's. Then, as a family, we would go out and present these ‘dinners in a bag’ to families identified through our church as being in need. We did this at Christmas, too, and took gifts along with the food.”
“We once had three Chinese international students from a local college over for Thanksgiving, and it was a great experience. International students really appreciate being part of a family for holidays. They are very curious about American home life and customs, but often don't have an opportunity to see the inside of an American home. It was also a great chance to expose our kids to another culture. Kids tend to build bridges quickly and make the whole experience much easier and more enjoyable for all.”
“Living near an Air Force base afforded us a unique opportunity to serve together as a family. During Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays, the base published a list of trainees that were available to visit the homes in the areas. These were very young men and women, most in their late teens and early twenties, who may have been away from home for the first time in their lives. They had been undergoing the rigors of basic training, but had time off during the holidays. Most of them were needing not only a nice home-cooked meal, but also the comfort and refreshment of spending some time in a family setting. We would pick them up at the base and bring them home with us. We all took special care to show them God’s love and our family’s appreciation for their service to our country.”
Here’s a family ministry that lasted far longer than just the holiday season...
“We discovered ‘houseparenting’. This is where a stable couple with their children moves onto a campus of 'children's homes' and lives in a group home with the children already there and becomes their foster family. Now, this decision did not come without a lot of prayer and guidance from the Lord and was definitely a life altering choice. But, after interviewing with several Christian organizations we discovered one nearby that we truly loved. We were offered the position after they interviewed us as a family. It required giving up our home, full time job and income, lifestyle, church family and most of our furnishings and moving into a very small 3 bedroom apartment attached to the cottage which would be the foster children's home. There were twelve boys living in the eight- bedroom cottage, all under the age of 12. And so our life as a full time foster family began. Our life revolved around a daily routine of waking at 6:00 am to prepare breakfast for seventeen, dressing them all for school, getting them on the bus and off to school. There were also regular visits with doctors, dentists, therapists, psychiatrists, and family visits with the foster children’s biological parents at times. After school there were scheduled activities to attend with the boys (in which our children were also involved), which included a 4-H program on the campus and animals to tend to, basketball games, karate classes, camps and field trips. We cooked dinner together and ate at 6:00 pm followed by clean up and mandatory study hall in the campus library or around the dinner table. Then, showers and bedtime and prayers were said at each bedside. We kissed our own children good night and quickly fell asleep to begin it all again the next day.”
“This family tradition was actually started in a large Sunday school class I taught (a singles class with over 2000 members, but average attendance of about 700...fun class), but it has become a standard for my family. I found a hole in my favorite sweater one icy Sunday morning while I was getting ready for church and the class I was to teach. I threw it away almost immediately, but then felt that I should take it with me to class. I thought there might be a message in finding a hole in my seven-year-old favorite sweater. I took it to the class, talked about the inconveniences and frustrations that enter our lives and told the class that I intended to give it to a homeless person when I left the church. Then I suggested, ‘Why don't you go home and find the coats that have shrunk due to darkness in your closet, meet me at Denny's for coffee and pie, and we can take all our coats to the homeless shelter.’ That afternoon, we delivered over 75 coats to the shelter, enjoyed coffee and pecan pie together and went home to our fireplaces and football games. Now that my sons are grown and live nearby, we often call them on cold days, invite them over for coffee and pie, suggest that they find the shrunken coats, theirs and the grandchildren's, and we deliver them to the shelter.”
We can’t teach our kids about giving with just words alone. They have to see that kind of Christ-like love and be a part of it. For all the people who shared their stories, giving became real and alive. That’s what makes it attractive to our families. Start a family tradition of giving this Christmas season!
Posted by
Martha & Greg Singleton
7:16 AM
I think, as a general rule, I tend to underestimate people. That realization came to me twice this past week, and the source of both revelations was an unlikely one – the public school system that we hear so many terrible things about.
Gilbert is a Bexar County juvenile probation officer whose job is to work within the schools to insure that troubled students stay on the straight-and-narrow. Actually, we’ve known Gilbert and his mom and dad and sister, Tara, more than twenty years now, back when he, himself, was just a kid. I can’t help it, but, to me, he’s still “Gibby”. As a probation officer, he’s doing a tremendous job touching teenagers’ lives, loving those unlovable ones, and being a no-nonsense voice of discipline for some kids who are in desperate need of structure in their lives. In visiting with these kids at school and in their homes, Gilbert noticed that many of them didn’t have coats to fend off the occasionally brutal blue northers that blow through South Texas. “It seemed like such a basic thing,” Gilbert told me. “But I realized that nobody had shown these kids enough love to even buy them a coat.” Starved for that love and attention, and lacking the stability that would make even the most humble house a home, these teens act out in socially unacceptable behavior.
But Gilbert has found a way to demonstrate his concern in a very practical way. He found a company that would sell him coats for $15. A probation officer with a wife and his own two little ones to support doesn’t have a lot of disposable income, but Gilbert and his family stretched their budget as far as possible to provide coats for the teens he is working with. But there was so much more that needed to be done. So, last week Gilbert started a movement.
He’s calling it “Got Your Back”, a reassuring reference to the support these kids need, as well as the coats he’s providing. His first order of business was to send an e-mail to all the faculty and staff at the high school, his alma mater, where Martha teaches and where Gilbert represents the Bexar County Probation Office. “I told them what I was doing,” he said, “and I couldn’t believe the response.” Within an hour, he had twenty pledges, and ten more before the day ended. The money was still rolling in yesterday when I spoke to him.
Annie, our daughter, teaches at a local middle school. Her husband, Robbie, is the youth pastor at Trinity Church, here in San Antonio. Last Christmas, the church youth group raised money to buy presents and throw a Christmas party for an orphanage in Nava, Mexico. I went with them, by the way, playing the role of Santa Claus. Annie teaches drama and she’s all about typecasting.
The trip to Mexico left such an impression on the kids from the church, that they have taken on that same task this year. The goal is to get every child in the orphanage a bicycle, something they all would love to have. Annie sent an e-mail to her fellow faculty members last week and informed them about the need, and the response was amazing. She called me up, with tears in her voice, to let me know that, by the end of the day, seven bicycles had been donated by her peers, and $200 had been collected. Since returning from the Thanksgiving holidays, the school is still buzzing about the opportunity, and even more has been pledged.
Those of us who consider ourselves "church people" may tend to get a little smug this time of the year. We become aware of so many opportunities for giving, and we’re moved to put forth a little effort to help out. That’s all very good. We pat ourselves on the back and reason that we’ve fulfilled our obligation for the year. But it’s no more than is happening in homes, schools, businesses and offices all over this country. Jesus never designated a certain season for giving. As Christ-followers, we need to expand our giving into a daily way of life. We need to set the example and lead the way, mirroring Jesus' heart for reaching out to others twelve months of the year.
If you’re suffering from a low level of patriotism, let me prescribe a generous dose of Philadelphia.
While Martha was collecting her accolades at all the dinners and the events last week at the National Journalism Educators convention, I managed to plot a schedule that would allow us to visit many of the historical sites in the City of Brotherly Love.
Equipped with some good walking shoes and warm coats to fend off temperatures in the low 30’s, we made our way through the streets of downtown Philadelphia into buildings that made history books come alive – Independence Hall, where our nation was born, Carpenter’s Hall where the First Continental Congress met in secret, Christ Church, which counted The Benjamin Franklin family and George and Martha Washington among its members, Betsy Ross’ home, and the City Tavern where the founding fathers met to discuss the day’s current events. Not one of these buildings, in itself, was impressive by its design or decor. They were small buildings, made up of small rooms. But big ideas found their roots there.
A flood of emotion surged through me as I considered the commitments that were made in those places. The signers of the Declaration of Independence promised that, “for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes, and our sacred honor.” And that was the price most of them had to pay in order to secure the liberty that we enjoy today.
Do we teach our kids today that there are some things worth giving everything, even our lives for? I read a speech by Christian sociologist and professor Tony Campolo that really made me think.
He said, “Here is what the Bible says, ‘And when the young no longer have dreams and the old no longer have visions, people perish.’ I spend most of my time on university campuses. Sometimes it upsets me because as I talk with the children, your children, they have no dreams—they have no visions. Let me tell what you have told them. You told them to be happy. ‘Mom, what do you think I ought to be?’ I ask any father, any mother. Every mother and father in America answers the same way. ‘I really don’t care as long as you’re happy.’ It kind of makes you sick, doesn’t it?"
There is something more important than possessions, status, or even happiness. That is the realization that life and liberty themselves are of the greatest value of all. We must teach our children that preserving those things that others have paid for is worth everything. The freedom that our founding fathers sacrificed to give us is priceless. And the salvation that Christ gave us through His own blood is worth everything.
“When God, your God, ushers you into the land he promised through your ancestors Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob to give you, you're going to walk into large, bustling cities you didn't build, well-furnished houses you didn't buy, come upon wells you didn't dig, vineyards and olive orchards you didn't plant. When you take it all in and settle down, pleased and content, make sure you don't forget how you got there—God brought you out of slavery in Egypt.”
Deuteronomy 6:10-12 (The Message)
It's November already! It seems like we just put all the holiday decorations back in their place, and now it's time to drag them out again. At the Singletons' house, we do the holidays HUGE! We've been accused of Griswold-like enthusiasm when we decorate and celebrate the holidays, but we persevere despite the ridicule. Let the games begin.
We stumbled upon a family holiday tradition not long after we were blessed with kids in our home. Having purchased a beautiful ceramic nativity scene soon after we married, we intended that this would be the centerpiece of our Christmas decorations for the rest of our lives. It held a place of prominence on the living room coffee table. We weren't thinking like parents then. Not long after Annie began to toddle around the house, during the 1981 holiday season, her curious little hands were reaching out for the figures in the manger. We reasoned that "no-no" was an inappropriate connotation to associate with Baby Jesus, so we sought a solution. Thank God for Winn's. It was the venerable five-and-dime that had graced the South Texas area for generations, and, inside, they offered a wide assortment of cheap plastic nativity scenes that begged to be handled by kids. We bought a particularly inexpensive set, garishly painted before lead-based contents were a consideration. It took over the place of honor and the beautiful set was moved up to the mantel. Have at it, Annie!
After Matt made made his appearance in our home, we realized there was a way that we could include the nativity scene in our family's holiday worship. Each evening, before we put them to bed, the kids took the plastic figures and moved them along on a journey from their bedrooms to the living room. We read a portion of the Christmas story every night, until Christmas morning came, when all the participants at the nativity gathered at the manger. Baby Jesus, our Gift from God was wrapped in a beautiful package, and we would unwrap Him and place him in the stable. The whole family would sing carols and songs of worship and join together in prayers of thanksgiving, and it developed into a significant part of our holidays, even after the kids were grown. Beginning in their elementary school years, we began to give Annie and Matt responsibility for preparing part of that special family worship. And by the time they reached high school age, they began to lead the devotional times.
As beautiful and meaningful as this tradition was to our family, we would be remiss if we failed to admit that it didn't always go off without a hitch. One year, the shepherds almost didn't make it to the manger. Matt was about six, and, in his dedication to nightly find a new place for the shepherds to rest on their journey, they got lost. Night after night, as we prepared for the devotional time, Matt would search everywhere, to no avail. He fretted about the shepherds well-being and wondered aloud how we could have a nativity scene without them. Finally, there was a Christmas miracle at our house. On Christmas morning, as we settled down around the coffee table for a time of communion, Matt's eyes grew wide, and he jumped to his feet and ran toward the hallway. Hallelujah, the shepherds had arrived! Matt had decided at one point during the holiday season, that the heater closet was a great place for shepherds to spend the night, but it was such a safe hiding place that he forgot where he had put them. When he remembered their location, lo, there was great rejoicing.
What traditions have you had in your home? We'd like to know all the significant family times that you've established through the years during Thanksgiving and Christmas. You can share it here on the "comments" or send us an e-mail. Have a blessed holiday season!
FINALLY! This is our first post to our new blog. We'll be sharing our thoughts here, and inviting you to join in the discussion. This is a community...a family. We're glad to have you here with us!
It’s a wild, wild ride from Thanksgiving to Christmas, with so much to decorate, to buy, to wrap, to mail, to cook...and work, too! But tonight, those precious moments in firelight and candlelight round the Christmas tree, and tomorrow, when family and friends gather, will make it all worth it. 
