Martha & Greg

Greg: "A Night Not So Silent"

2011-12-21T19:15:00.000-08:00

We sing about a silent night, calm and peaceful.
It’s a pleasant picture,
But just how quiet was that night?
In a crowded city,
People, shoulder-to-shoulder, back-to-back
And in each others' faces.
All the places to stay were full.
The frustrated innkeepers loudly proclaiming
That there was just no more room.
The only space to be found was a smelly stable,
Cattle mooing, sheep bleating, donkeys braying.
A young woman, an out-of-towner,
In labor with her first child.
The Child is born,
And cries out greetings to His new world.
A star gleams brightly right overhead
Making the night almost as bright as day.
And then, there's that rejoicing,
Voices of the Angels of Heaven themselves.
And then, of simple shepherds
Who only moments before
Had been shaken by all the other-worldly chaos.
Now, in harmony,
With one voice,
Fortissimo.
Silent nights may be pleasant,
But I’ll save them for the times
That I must have rest.
I want my nativities to be loud.
Filled with laughter and love,
With the underpinning of hope.
And then, there’s that rejoicing,
Unmistakable and attractive.
Music, lights, and decorations,
Each one purposefully declaring
The Glory of God.
So that each one who passes
Through the doors of our home,
Family, friends, neighbors,
And even strangers,
Knows that this day deserves
Much more than passivity.
His birthday calls for noise.
Happy noise, loud noise, invigorating noise.
This night, I will not be silent.

Martha's Christmas Thoughts

2011-12-18T04:05:00.000-08:00

Exotic kings, bearing gifts. Unexpected, brilliant light from a star, moving low across a continent. And the night sky full of angels, singing songs no human ear has heard before or since. That’s the stuff a major event in the universe is made of.
That’s the part of the Christmas story that causes cease-fires, and brings nations and their rulers to their knees. That’s the event of the ages, and history and the future are changed forever because of it.

The glory of Heaven, folded and laid aside like a garment, exchanged for hungry shepherds, dusty and smelly from camping out with their animals for days on end,
a stable, with oxen and donkeys and dirt and earthy odors. That’s the stuff of poverty, all too ordinary even today, and though we try, not much has really changed it.

And so I hum along with my favorite carols on CD, and artfully arrange wise men and shepherds and angels and sheep in their gilded glory among the greenery and twinkle lights on my mantle, and plan for cookies and communion and family and alms, celebrating the event of the universe.

But from that box of straw where the King of all Ages slept in the form of a helpless baby, His road would lead him past a sea to a cup and a sword and a hill,
my hill, where He took my sin, my scorn, my disease and my shame, and died on a cross meant, from the beginning, for me.

And in the depth of my heart, far beyond even Christmas pageants and outreach and service and charity, I treasure the end of the story as much as the beginning. That’s the moment of redemption, and I am changed forever because of it.

Choosing To Change Our World

2011-07-23T08:25:00.000-07:00

This post is a little bit different than the others here. At the end, I’m going to invite you to become a part of something big that’s happening. But first…

I suppose I shouldn’t be surprised when God does something out of the ordinary to emphasize a point. He’s done that often. But I’m still amazed when He involves Himself in the lives of people and weaves their stories together just so He can work His purposes through their lives.

When Martha and I wrote our new book, Let It Shine: Partnering With God To Raise World Changers, we were responding to an urgency we felt to encourage parents to build families with a mission in mind. We wanted them to create an atmosphere in their homes that allowed each person there to develop courage to live out their calling in the world where God has placed them.

In Orlando, Florida, Jason C. Dukes, a pastor and father of five is passionate about his church and his family “living sent” - being a letter from God communicating His love and hope in the message of their daily lives among everyone in their world. So, Jason authored the book, Live Sent: You Are A Letter.

Mark Russell is the CEO of Russell Media in Boise, Idaho, and, for him, it’s all about the "BAM". "BAM" is “business as mission”, Mark’s business model. He is eager to share with others the practice of using business to strategically accomplish missional purposes, bringing God’s heart and message into the marketplace. He has written a book, The Missional Entrepreneur: Principles and Practices for Business as Mission.

It wasn’t a coincidence that Martha and I have had the privilege of being connected with Jason and Mark. God placed within our hearts the same passion. And, New Hope Publishers has that passion, too. And we’re discovering that there are many others who do, too. I believe with all my heart that this is a theme that God wants to begin to infuse in all of us.

So this is where you come into the picture. As we’ve met people around the country, this summer, we’ve recognized that God is beginning to stir people to live a missional lifestyle. So many of you sense the same calling in your family, your church, your business, your everyday life, and New Hope has created a way you can participate with us.

During this coming week, if you buy two copies of our book, Let It Shine, New Hope will send you Live Sent and The Missional Entrepreneur, at no charge! The idea, then, is that you’ll give the second copy of Let It Shine to someone else who wants to live missionally, so that they can be encouraged.

Here’s a link to New Hope’s page that will direct you to the instructions about this opportunity:

http://www.newhopedigital.com/index.php/summer-special/

If you purchase the books on Amazon.com or ChristianBook.com, be sure that, after you read the books, you write a review there. If you have any questions, please email us at marthaandgreg@aol.com.

I woke up this morning with a great idea! If you buy two copies of Let It Shine, two of Live Sent, and two of The Missional Entrepreneur, you’ll have four copies of each book, twelve books total. That would be one set for you and three sets of the books that you could give to others.

Please share this opportunity with your friends, and post it on your Facebook and Twitter. The offer ends, next Saturday, July 30, so buy the books today! We’re so excited about what God can do through the message in these books and through your life as you choose to change your world!

There's A Dinosaur

2011-03-22T19:53:00.000-07:00

There’s a dinosaur on my coffee table
Lurking right there behind the stack of imported trays
Piled with very expensive artificial apples and pears
His lumpy green plastic head lifted as a silent roar escapes his lurid mouth
I think my living room has never looked more lovely

There’s a dump truck on my kitchen window box,
Headed straight for the antique ceramic salt and pepper shakers,
Two metal star molds lying askew in its wake
With a plastic kid from the Fisher Price bus stuck underneath
An arrangement I find wonderfully uplifting in the morning sunlight

In the guest room, where one dark cactus green wall accents the deep gold of the others
And picks up the desert reds and rusts and blues of the designer spread,
Woody and Buzz Lightyear dominate from the Toy Story 3 sheets that cover the air mattress on the floor
And I think this might be the best room in my whole house

Precious clutter
Put there by a beloved little boy
Who will not play these games, with these toys,
For more than a moment
Before he moves on, with a speed that catches parents by surprise,
To Little League, and computer games, and first cars and first dates and dorm rooms and first jobs
And very rare visits where he makes his bed and hangs his towel and leaves by Sunday afternoon.

I know how this story ends, with perfect décor, and every detail in place
And empty drawers and closets with plenty of space
So now, I wander through the rooms my grandson left, taking pleasure in seeing how he played
Knowing that the hours he spends in joyful adventures at “G-Diddy’s house”
Are among the greatest treasures I will ever own.

Crayons, New Pencils, and Prayer

2010-08-15T06:15:00.000-07:00

As brand new boxes of crayons, tablets and colorful folders take front and center in stores, the excitement of new beginnings catches on, and parents begin shopping for book bags and blunt scissors and school shoes, eager to fully prepare their children for the approaching school year.
But for parents and kids alike, new situations also can produce new anxieties, and the most important preparation for every family member is prayer.
Whether our kids attend public, private, or parochial school, or we teach them at home, we need to remember that God has not given us a spirit of fear, but has in fact called us to take His message of redemption and hope to our neighbors and communities.
Discuss with your kids their individual roles, and your role as a family, in showing the love of Jesus. Let your children express their hopes and anxieties about the upcoming year. Talk about the needs you are aware of in your school and community.
Then, as a family, begin to pray for your elementary, middle and high schools. Pray for administrators, teachers, students and their families. Ask for God’s protection, His grace, His blessing, and pray that His truth will be evident in every class, and His love be revealed to the entire community. Even if you are active home schoolers, we would encourage you to make it a family project to pray regularly for your public schools.
An engaging, meaningful object lesson that will help your children visualize the effect of their prayers would be to read the story of Jericho in Chapter 6 of Joshua, and then in the evening walk the perimeter of your school, each family member silently praying for all who are connected with it, and for your own family’s interactions there. While it is certainly true that God will hear your prayers wherever you are, that mental picture can encourage your kids as they go through the blessings and challenges of the coming school year.
Make it a point this year to keep your prayers for your school and your passion for your neighbors and community as sharp as those bright new crayons, and see what beautiful things God will do in and through your family this school year.

2010-04-27T03:32:00.000-07:00

Does anyone ever actually want to be a couch potato?

What is there to inspire or motivate us about a slovenly, overweight, crumb-covered, do-nothing, sitting around all day, stuffing all kinds of junk food, mindlessly flipping channels?

The food may be momentarily entertaining, but it serves only to slow him down, and there might occasionally be something worth watching on TV, but the constant channel surfing guarantees that she will never have a thought of her own.

There’s nothing in that picture that any of us would aspire to.

And yet, for many of us in America today, that is a precise description of what the younger generation sees of our spiritual lives. We should not be at all shocked that a large number of kids who grow up in the church are heading out the door the minute they are 18, never to be heard from again.

We are a bunch of spiritual couch potatoes. Sadly, too many of us are content to sit in our comfortable pews Sunday after Sunday, listening to music and rating it as if we were on “American Bandstand,” and flitting from congregation to congregation because “we’re just not getting fed.”

It’s no wonder that our young people want no part of that.
Paul himself shot down the idea that mature Christians are supposed to be “fed.” He pointed out that babies need to be fed, but adults are supposed to be out hunting and preparing their own meals…and providing for the babies. So, if we are regularly studying and applying truth we find in our Bibles to our own lives, what is it that we should be doing at church?

Like our couch potato who finally goes into the kitchen to prepare himself a nutritious meal, we may find, when we look into the New Testament, that we become energized to actually be the church in this world.

That would mean exercising our spiritual gifts and calling, by getting out of the pew and into our community—feeding the hungry, providing for widows and orphans, protecting the weak, giving to the poor, being friends to the friendless, visiting those who are sick or in prison, demonstrating to them that there is hope because Jesus loves them.

Today’s young adults, whether they are believers or not, have a deep concern about the needs they see in the world around them. Not content to just cluck their tongues and feel sorry, they want to take action. They live green, they volunteer, they raise funds for charities and disaster relief, they travel around the world at their own expense to dig wells and build schools.

They should see the church as a group of people more concerned with giving than getting, people who are responsibly training for spiritual fitness, people who are racing to meet the needs of the world around them with power and compassion, in the name of Jesus.

Let’s get off the spiritual couch, and invite the next generation to join us in running the race, intent on the prize of the high calling of life in Christ Jesus.

Nothing much was going on...

2009-12-22T20:33:00.000-08:00

Zacharias went to burn the incense, as he had for years as a priest, simply because it was his turn, and he did what he was supposed to do. It had been years since he and Elizabeth had put away their dream of having children, and just gone about the business of their days, faithfully living the best way they could.
Mary went about her daily chores, performing the lowly tasks women in her culture were assigned to do, not resenting, but working to be a girl who would please God. It really wasn’t a big deal.
Joseph worked in his shop, building carts and chairs and mending tables, day by day following the holy law to the best of his ability. Even as he absorbed the news that his fiancé was pregnant, knowing that he was not the father, he put aside his disappointment, and tried to figure out what would be the right thing to do.
The shepherds were sitting in a cold, dark field, huddled around a fire, making sure the sheep were not attacked by animals or stolen by thieves, the same as they did night after night, year after year. It was a job without much challenge, without much pay, with little or no respect from the community. But it was their job, and they were doing it.
Anna and Simeon were in the temple, each praying and hoping as they had every day for years…So long, in fact, that the first fire of inspiration that had motivated them long ago had dwindled to ashes, and each one’s attendance there had become habit motivated simply by the desire to faithfully do what they believed was right.
It had been over 2,000 years since God had spoken to His people through the prophets. Their land was occupied by a foreign power, and life was hard. God’s promises didn’t seem to have much to do with what their lives were like. But they were faithful, and spent their days doing the things they knew to be right.
And then!
God interrupted routines, beginning by sending Gabriel to give incredible news to Mary, to Elizabeth, to Zacharias, to Joseph, to the shepherds.
In one night, the world was turned upside down, and a Redeemer was born who would restore intimacy between God and man, and who Himself would be the answer to every longing of the hearts of men and women for all time.
There are believers this Christmas season who have been living in the place where nothing much seems to be happening. Like Mary and Joseph, like Zacharias and Elizabeth and the shepherds, we are going about our days, motivated by faith to do the right thing, though circumstances are not what we had dreamed of.
For us, this is a good time to remember that faith, faithfulness, is the substance of things hoped for! Whatever it is that we are longing for God to do, it is our faith, and our faithfulness in the place that He has us right now, that will allow Him to bring about His plans for us.
My prayer this Christmas season is that we all will find ourselves, like Simeon and Anna, faithfully in the place where He has called us to be, so that, like them, our eyes can behold His coming.
I pray that this year, the routine will be interrupted by the glorious. This year, may you suddenly find Christmas happening in your heart!

Emmanuel!
Martha

Happy Birthday, Josiah!

2009-11-18T12:15:00.000-08:00

Dear Josiah,

Happy first birthday to the best grandson in the whole world! That’s not just bragging. That’s a fact. I always knew being a grandpa would be great, but I never dreamed how amazing my grandson would be. Has there ever been another one-year-old who would crawl up in his grandpa’s lap just to watch a football game on television? It was just too good to be true that your first words were “hut-hut’.

So, I’m pretty thrilled about how this first year has turned out, even though it started out filled with fear for your whole family. You looked so perfectly healthy when you came into this world, then the doctors said you were going to need serious surgery immediately. You were the trooper you always have been. They literally reached inside you and took everything out and laid it on a table to fix what was broken. For one whole month you had tubes all over you and were isolated from us in that intensive care room. But you were so tough. You made it through.

Then, they told us you had cystic fibrosis. I didn’t know exactly what that was, but it sounded scary. And, it was even scarier when I started reading about it. There is no cure for it and the prognosis is pretty discouraging. But, thank God for all the doctors and medications that have kept you very healthy and very happy during your first year.

One thing that I never expected when I became a grandpa, was how much you were going to teach me. But God has used you to teach this old dog plenty of new ways of looking at things.

You’ve taught me, once again, how pure real love is. It’s something that we all need to be reminded of, and your crinkled-up face when you give me your biggest smile does that for me. Like your Uncle Matt said, we needed you to keep us all from becoming “bitter intellectuals”.

You’ve taught me what great people your Mommy and Daddy are. I thought I knew that already but I really didn’t. I knew that I loved them and that they were fun and smart, and that I was glad they were part of my family. But I had never seen the real beauty of the grace and peace that is within them. Day by day, they walk through the whole ordeal of your illness. They don’t complain about the hours and hours that breathing treatments and therapies and doctors appointments require of them. They don’t fret over the huge expenses of special medications and specialists’ fees. They work diligently to find the balance of keeping you healthy and yet, not overprotecting you. They’re joyful, knowing that difficult times might be ahead. All the while, they do above and beyond what’s expected of them as they reach out to teach and love teenagers in their work. You are blessed that you belong to them, and I’m blessed that they are my daughter and son-in-law.

Most importantly, Josiah, you’ve taught me how God wants me to live my life. I was so frightened when the doctor spoke those words, “cystic fibrosis”. Every negative thought immediately flooded my mind. But then God stepped in and spoke so calmly to me, “You’ll live through this day by day.” It’s true that we don’t have any promise that tomorrow you’ll be with us. But God reminded me that that’s not just true about you, but everyone. We’re all just day-to-day here on this earth, so we love God and each other as if this day is our last.

“Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don't worry about missing out. You'll find all your everyday human concerns will be met. Give your entire attention to what God is doing right now, and don't get worked up about what may or may not happen tomorrow. God will help you deal with whatever hard things come up when the time comes.” (Matthew 6:33-34 The Message)

I live this day believing that God will bring healing to your life – praying for the doctors and scientists that are searching for a cure, and depending on the miraculous power of God to touch you. But I live it knowing that with you and with everyone else, every moment I must love wholeheartedly, without expectations or keeping score. I can’t allow worry or concern about what the future might hold to crowd out “right now”.

So I love every single moment that I get to spend with you, Little Man. I can’t begin to tell you how thankful I am for you and how much I love you. So let’s celebrate this first year as big as we can – with football and loud music and funny faces and monkeys and Veggie Tales and everything else you love. Happy birthday to the greatest grandson that’s ever lived!

I love you so much!
G-Diddy

Hear Us On FamilyLife Today!

2009-11-16T14:43:00.000-08:00

Here’s a save-the-date for you! We received a note from Family Life Today that our “Setting Up Stones” interview will be broadcast in two parts, Monday and Tuesday, December 7 and 8. FamilyLife Today is hosted by Dr. Dennis Rainey, President of FamilyLife and Bob Lepine. It airs on over 900 stations all over the world.
You may have seen Dr. Rainey on Fox News last week, talking about the ministry that FamilyLife has for military families. You can see that online at

http://www.familylife.com/site/c.dnJHKLNnFoG/b.5601869/k.6089/Dennis_Rainey__Fox_News.htm?from=hpvideobox

To find out the time and station in your area for our interview, go to

http://www.familylife.com/site/c.dnJHKLNnFoG/b.3469313/k.93D4/Find_a_station.htm

Please pray that our thoughts and words on the broadcasts will make an impact on families all over the world.

On Losing A Friend

2009-06-01T12:35:00.000-07:00

I would have expected a phone call last evening. But, I knew it wouldn’t be coming, so I just shut my phone off so I could deal with the emotion the events of the day had brought my way.

I lost a good friend yesterday, very unexpectedly, and much too early. Bill passed away on the basketball court, doing something he loved to do, with the person he most enjoyed sharing it with – his son Zach. Bill and I shared the same passions, and that’s why it didn’t take too long for us to begin to connect after we first met. He loved God intensely, and extravagantly poured out the overflow of that love on his family. He loved to laugh, boisterously, with friends. And, he loved sports. What I enjoyed most about Bill was the way all those passions kind of sloshed together. There was a seamless flow in our conversations together that usually included bits and pieces of all those things. The extent of the family and marriage counsel he sought from me was how a dad could watch his kids compete and succeed in sports without becoming too proud or too pushy. He wondered what things I had done to make Martha more interested in sports so he could share them with Deborah, too.

Bill had a real gift. I suppose it was what made him so successful in sales. I’ve never been friends with anyone who asked so many questions about me, what my thoughts were, what made me tick. And, after he figured me out, he was diligent about sharing those passions with me. The first time we were really engaged in more than cursory conversation, he managed to find out that our son Matt was attending Baylor University, so, we were a family of Baylor sports fans. That’s all it took. He pledged to me that he was going to be a Bear Backer, too, except, of course, when they faced his beloved Texas Tech Red Raiders.

And that’s when the phone calls started. I could count on hearing from him every time Baylor was on TV, or when the paper ran a story about them. The sport didn’t make any difference – football, basketball, baseball, track, men’s teams or women’s teams. The phone would ring, and he wouldn’t have to identify himself, he just led off with, “What did you think of the game?” So, when Baylor bowed out of the NCAA baseball tournament yesterday, the phone should have rung, Bill should have been on the other end to console me, and he would have ended the conversation with, “Oh well, football season starts in another month, and I’m expecting Robert Griffin to make big noise for the Bears this year. Hey! We love you guys!” But the phone was quiet.

I always felt that Bill was thinking about me. He made me feel that he valued my opinion and appreciated my company. After all, that’s just exactly what real friends do. I saw him at church yesterday morning, the first time our paths had crossed in about a month. He threw his arms around me and said, loudly, of course, “Man, we’ve missed you guys! When can we get together?” Next time we get together Bill, time won’t constrain us and busyness won’t deter us. We’ll talk and laugh as long as we want to.

So, I’ve been reminded the past twenty-four hours how important it is to shake off the tyranny of the urgent, those things that cry out for attention and fill our time, but are of no eternal value. Those people God has placed in my life really mean something. Lord, help me to be aware of my time, cautious of my attention and lavish with my love.

On The Radio

2009-05-26T13:46:00.000-07:00

WBCL Radio Network in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, interviewed us on Monday, May 18. It’s a six-station network that covers Indiana and parts of Ohio and Michigan. Lynne Ford is the host of the weekly morning program, “Author, Author” that features interviews with several authors each week. Here it is! Our interview begins about 20 minutes into the program.

Setting Up Stones on WBCL

Warts And All

2009-05-20T11:55:00.000-07:00

This past weekend, Martha drug out some of the old family photo albums, and coerced me to look through them with her. As we reminisced about some great times, I also happened to run across a few pictures that I would just as soon incinerate. They were scary, but I got up enough guts to post one of the least brutal ones here. No snickering allowed, because I’m sure you have some that would rival it.

Now, there’s a way, though, to embrace the embarrassment that families have for so long kept hidden. This morning, I found an “interesting” website, awkwardfamilyphotos.com. People post those strange photos right out of their family albums there for the whole world to see, and, surprisingly, don’t seem to be at all uncomfortable about doing it. Apparently, it’s the hottest new thing to arrive on the internet, according to ABC News and Fox News reports. In the last 30 days, the site has drawn over 20 million visitors. If you decide to visit it, just know it’s not completely family-friendly.

"It's tapping into something universal," said the site’s co-founder Mike Bender. "Everybody has experienced not only the awkwardness ... [but] I think there's something almost cathartic for people to share their awkwardness. That was always the hope."

It just might be a movement whose time has come.

Trying to be perfect can get really tiresome. Somewhere, we got the idea that it was really important for our families to look good. But, in doing that, we’ve burdened the ones we love most with the millstone, “whatever you do, don’t embarrass us.” That means that many of the struggles that we go through have to be swept under the rug. Even within the walls of our own home, that atmosphere demands that we “put on a good face” and bury the difficulties we’re dealing with. Being real is rare, but it can be the most healthy thing that our families can embrace.

Fear blocks that free flow of authenticity. Almost everyone has a fear of vulnerability, that, somehow, if we show that we’re less-than-perfect, there will most assuredly be a disastrous outcome. What if I’m not accepted any longer? Will they think less of me? Will I relinquish some kind of control? As we grow in our honest communication within our family, those questions and fears begin to crumble.

Being genuine creates an atmosphere at home that cultivates many of the attitudes that a family should find very attractive. It breaks down walls that block communication. With the awareness that everyone has strengths and weaknesses, it encourages teamwork. And, it lays a foundation of honesty, that affects each family member's relationship with each other and with God.

Walking with God, knowing and loving and serving Him, is a process, not a formula. It’s exciting and fulfilling and messy and challenging. If we honestly allow our family to observe us as we participate, we will allow them to see the reality of the God we love and serve, and they will be drawn to Him.

Then, when others see our family, they're not impressed about how perfect we are. They see, instead, a picture of God's grace.

2009-05-07T03:31:00.000-07:00

If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then will I hear from heaven and will forgive their sin and will heal their land.
II Chronicles 7:14 (NIV)

This is not "our day" - a time to flaunt our identity, celebrate our significance, or chastise those who choose not to acknowledge it. This is our solemn call to humility and repentance, seeking God's mercy and grace.

Tech Check

2009-05-05T14:34:00.001-07:00

I don’t claim to be a technology expert. In fact, education consultant Marc Prensky would label me a “digital immigrant.” That’s because I’m old enough to remember when computers were massive monoliths that we never dreamed would someday be such an important part of our lives. I do know enough about technology, though, to know when I see something that provides some good answers to some of the cyberspace problems that we all hear about. I’m especially interested when parents are given a technological tool that allows them to keep their kids safe while encouraging them to experience the enrichment that the internet has to offer. So, I was particularly eager share some things that I recently discovered. Now there’s a chance that this stuff might be old news to some of you, and, if it is, simply file it away as a doddering digital immigrant’s discovery of the world around him. But, if you’ve never seen this before, and it ends up working for you, your undying gratitude is sufficient!

KIDO’Z v 1.0
www.kidoz.net

KIDO’Z v 1.0 is a safe internet browser for kids ages 3-11. It was developed by a small Israeli company, and gives kids a great introduction to the internet in a protected environment. Here’s how they describe their product:

“The KIDO'Z Kid's Web Environment is the safe, easy and fun way for young kids to surf their favorite sites, watch videos and play games. Each kid is unique, with different likes, dislikes, and different cultural and language backgrounds. And so, we created KIDO'Z with that in mind. Tons of top kids' content is loaded into KIDO'Z by the KIDO'Z team. But what makes KIDO'Z special is the content added by you, the parents. You can personalize KIDO'Z for your kids by uploading new content, selecting user interface and content languages, enhancing security settings, allowing/blocking any content...and more!”

YourSphere
www.yoursphere.com
Online social networking is huge among preteens and teens, but, they can not only be a distraction, they can be dangerous, too. A California mom of five kids developed YourSphere as an alternative for MySpace, Facebook, and other sites like them. YourSphere claims to be a completely safe online environment, but there are some reviewers that suggest that might be impossible. Certainly, though, the measures taken to keep the site free of harmful activity is far beyond most others of the networking genre. YourSphere also offers some interesting perks like social hubs that link your kids with others that have similar interests, and a rewards program where members can earn prizes. There is also a network strictly for the members’ parents, and a parents’ blog led by Mary Kay Hoal, the site’s founder.

Check out KIDO’Z and YourSphere and see if they might be a technology solution at your house. I’d like to hear your opinion about these sites, and your reviews if you choose to use them.

It's Worth Celebrating!

2009-04-24T06:22:00.000-07:00

San Antonio knows how to celebrate. Fiesta is happening right now - twelve days of parades, music, fun and food at events all over town, all day and all night long. I’ve lived here my whole life, and it still amazes me how the entire city is always looking for a reason to party. During the Rodeo in February, everyone digs out their boots and hats and becomes cowboys and cowgirls for a couple of weeks. During Christmas, lights fill all the trees along the Riverwalk, and thousands of worshippers, singing Christmas carols, travel through downtown with La Posada, a reenactment of Mary and Joseph’s search through Bethlehem for a place for Jesus to be born. We host the nation’s largest Martin Luther King Day festivities, and you can’t begin to imagine the spontaneous revelry when our San Antonio Spurs win an NBA championship.

After being enslaved for centuries, Moses led the Israelites across the Red Sea on dry ground, and the Egyptians were swallowed up when God caused the sea to close in on them. That was a reason for a real celebration. They were free! Exuberant singing and dancing filled the Hebrews’ camp. And God enjoyed every minute of it.

The scriptures are filled with scenes of unbridled joy. Some of it was just spontaneous response to God’s goodness and faithfulness, like when David danced before the Lord. But much of the celebration was planned and intentional. Throughout the Old Testament God’s people were called to celebrate.

And the Levites, too, quieted the people, telling them, “Hush! Don’t weep! For this is a sacred day.” So the people went away to eat and drink at a festive meal, to share gifts of food, and to celebrate with great joy because they had heard God’s words and understood them.
Nehemiah 8:11-12 (NLT)

All the Israelites present in Jerusalem celebrated the Passover for seven days, celebrated exuberantly. The Levites and priests praised God day after day, filling the air with praise sounds of percussion and brass. Hezekiah commended the Levites for the superb way in which they had led the people in the worship of God. When the feast and festival—that glorious seven days of worship, the making of offerings, and the praising of God, the God of their ancestors—were over, the tables cleared and the floors swept, they all decided to keep going for another seven days! So they just kept on celebrating, and as joyfully as they began.
II Chronicles 30:21-23 (The Message)

Good people, cheer God! Right-living people sound best when praising. Use guitars to reinforce your Hallelujahs! Play his praise on a grand piano! Invent your own new song to him; give him a trumpet fanfare.
Psalm 33:1-3 (The Message)

It all sounds pretty lively doesn’t it?

In the New Testament, Jesus told about the celebrations of the “good and faithful servant” and the father after the prodigal son came home. In Thessalonians 5:16, Paul put it pretty simply – “rejoice evermore.”

I particularly enjoy the image in Zephaniah, when God actually joins in the celebration with His people.

On that day the announcement to Jerusalem will be,
“Cheer up, Zion! Don’t be afraid!
For the Lord your God is living among you.
He is a mighty savior.
He will take delight in you with gladness.
With his love, he will calm all your fears.
He will rejoice over you with joyful songs.”
Zephaniah 3:16-17 (NLT)

Maybe we just don’t celebrate enough. Or maybe we just need to refocus our rejoicing. God knows that celebrations are important when they’re directed to Him. He knows that our family’s faith is enriched when our homes are filled with praise. Kids don’t forget special times, fun and exciting times that are focused on the goodness of God. And, for that matter, adults don’t either.

I’ve realized how important it is to set aside specific moments to engage my family and friends in celebrating who God is. I want to acknowledge God’s working in our lives through even the little things. I want to make the seemingly insignificant things God does really significant. I think I’m going to throw more parties.

Creativity Ain't For Cowards

2009-04-17T09:03:00.000-07:00

This is a great time of the year to be a man. It's one of those special times when sports converge and testosterone reigns. The NBA playoffs are underway, baseball season has begun, and the NFL will have its annual draft of college players next Saturday.

It's one time of the year when I really feel comfortable, because I can discuss any of these topics intelligently and incessantly. I'm in my zone, like Michael Jordan used to be when the Bulls were trailing in Game 7, or when John Elway was quarterbacking the Broncos with two minutes left and 80 yards for a win. Just give me half a chance and you're certain to be mesmerized.

I'm just like most men. When I'm operating in my arena I have all the confidence in the world. But, please don't put me in a place that I'm not very sure of myself. Don't insist that I navigate treacherous waters where I might go under. Don't set me up to fail, and above all, don't make me look bad. That's when I just might crawl back into my shell and whimper a little bit. Believe me, a whining man is not a pretty sight.

If I may, let me offer some wisdom to all the wives out there. Your husband doesn't particularly like to be called “artistic” or “creative.” There's something just a little dainty about those words. They conjure up images that are way too colorful, that smell too sweet, and that inevitably include lace and flowers. It reminds me of a time when Matt, our son, was about 10 years old, and somehow, he and I got duped into accompanying Martha into the craft store. About 15 minutes into the journey, he looked at me and said, “Dad, if hell is anything like this place, I really don't want to go there.” I understood completely.

The unfamiliar is not an easy place to be. The time comes, though, when the comfortable ways just don't work any more. I remember realizing that communicating God's truth to my kids was going to require more than sitting them down in front of me and reading a devotional book to them. If I wanted them to know a God who is alive and involved, I was going to have to portray Him to them in that way. I needed to be creative in order to demonstrate the Creator. And, that, sounded very scary to me.

McNair Wilson, was, at one time, Senior Imagineer for the Walt Disney Corporation. He was the guy who came up with ideas for all the rides and attractions at the theme parks and made them come to life. He created all the Disney things that not only captured kids' attention, but adults', as well. McNair now teaches companies and organizations not to be afraid of that word “creativity,” but, instead, use it to effectively communicate their message.

That starts with redefining it. McNair admits that the mystique of the word scares many people away. “I can talk about creativity for hours and never mention art supplies,” he said. Instead, he explains it as “rearranging the old to appear new.” That sounds much more within my element.

McNair talks about being creative in terms of “challenging assumptions” and “taking risks.” That's certainly something that guys can identify with. It makes you want to strap on the pads and get out on the field.

So, it requires courage to challenge those assumptions. We have to be bold about it, and keep taking risks even when we fail miserably. Creativity is a very manly thing.

It's Friday...But Sunday's Coming!

2009-04-10T08:21:00.000-07:00

“When we were utterly helpless, Christ came at just the right time and died for us sinners. Now, most people would not be willing to die for an upright person, though someone might perhaps be willing to die for a person who is especially good. But God showed his great love for us by sending Christ to die for us while we were still sinners. And since we have been made right in God’s sight by the blood of Christ, he will certainly save us from God’s condemnation. For since our friendship with God was restored by the death of his Son while we were still his enemies, we will certainly be saved through the life of his Son. So now we can rejoice in our wonderful new relationship with God because our Lord Jesus Christ has made us friends of God.”
Romans 5:6-11 (NLT)

His Grace

2009-04-07T14:50:00.000-07:00

I was feeling pretty smug about what I had decided to teach in our Sunday School class. We’re spending the next couple of months discussing “churchspeak” – those words we hear so much but we might not really know their relevance in our family, our work and in all our day-to-day living. I figured I knew most of the definitions and applications of these words since I, too, had heard them all my life. I was confident I had it all covered.

The first word I chose was “grace.” It’s a good word, even though it’s a bit difficult to fully understand. But, I already knew all the offerings from Vine’s Expository Dictionary, all the technical explanations of “grace,” so I was off to a flying start. As He as often done before, though, God had another idea that He wanted to share with me. Although I knew the meaning of “grace,” I needed to be reminded of the reality of it.

It took something very unexpected to bring “grace” from my head to my heart. As I often do, I was discussing with my son, Matt, where I was headed in my writing and teaching. He asked if I had ever heard U2’s song “Grace”. I was vaguely familiar with it, but only for my musical enjoyment and not my theology. I re-listened to it, though, and found myself confronted by grace as it’s supposed to appear in real life. It seemed that Bono had taught me what I was planning to teach my Sunday School class. Imagine that!

As I began to read the “grace” settings in Scripture in a new fresh way, I was overwhelmed at the power contained within that word.

“The Word became flesh and made his dwelling among us. We have seen his glory, the glory of the One and Only, who came from the Father, full of grace and truth.”
John 1:14-17 (NIV)

“For the LORD God is a sun and shield; the LORD will give grace and glory; no good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly.”
Psalm 84:11 (NKJV)

Then, I began to see what grace means to me, personally.

“Therefore, since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand.”
Romans 5:1-2 (NIV)

“For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God, and are justified freely by his grace through the redemption that came by Christ Jesus.”
Romans 3:23 (NIV)

But, probably the greatest impact of all was when I was reminded of my responsibility as a recipient of God’s grace. Thank God, His grace is free. It has no limits, and the very nature of grace is that there’s nothing that I can do to earn it. But, I am obligated to give back the same measure of grace that God gives me. And that’s where I’m humbled and convicted.

Just this week, a friend was treated unfairly on his job, and I wanted so much for that supervisor to suffer for it. On another occasion, I shut down when I should have responded to help someone who was in need. I confronted my own family members, whom I love so much, with a nasty “there-you-go-again” attitude. Those things aren’t graceful, and they certainly don’t reflect in the least God’s grace that has been extended to me.

What would “grace” look like in my relationships, or in my reactions to situations with which I’m confronted? How can I bring “grace” into settings around me that are ugly and Godless? How can I make “grace” more than just a word?

For a book that we’re writing, Martha and I had a chance to interview Lindsay, a young middle school teacher in the Bronx. Most of her students, because of the conditions they live in, are hopeless. Often, they react to their situations in very destructive and hurtful ways. But Lindsay understands that God has called her to love them anyway. She knows she must bring grace into those kids’ lives.

“On the first day of school,” she said, “the first thing I tell them is ‘I’ve been thinking about you all summer. I love you already. You may not believe this, but you can’t earn my love. You can make straight A’s and have perfect behavior all year, or you can get detention three times a week, and I’m going to love you the same.’ And then I spend all year trying to prove it.”

That is grace extended. That’s what the word really means.

Celebrating President's Day

2009-02-16T05:59:00.000-08:00

“I urge, then, first of all, that requests, prayers, intercession and thanksgiving be made for everyone— for kings and all those in authority, that we may live peaceful and quiet lives in all godliness and holiness. This is good, and pleases God our Savior, who wants all men to be saved and to come to a knowledge of the truth.”
I Timothy 2:1-4 (NIV)

No matter our political affiliation, God has called us to pray for our leaders. We have a great opportunity today, on Presidents’ Day, to gather the family together and do just that – pray for President Obama. Talk about what to pray – for protection, for wisdom, for his relationship with God. Then, pray that as Christians, we have the freedom and the heart to live out our faith and make a difference in our world.

Here are some more ideas about how your family can celebrate this Presidents’ Day:

Learn more about the American Presidents. The National Park Service has a section on their website,http://www.nps.gov/pub_aff/pres/trivia.htm , entitled “Just For Fun: Presidential Trivia”. You’ll find some interesting facts about every U. S. President there.

A Presidential Project. If you have elementary school children and older, give each member of you family a project for this week. Let them choose an American president , research his life and put together a presentation about him. Then, next weekend, have a time when each family member makes his presentation.

If I was President... Let each family member take their turn as “president”. Hold a press conference and allow all the other members of the family, the “White House press corps”, ask questions about the “president’s” policies and ideas about the future. This one might be worth putting on video for posting at http://www.youtube.com , or http://www.tangle.com, the “family-friendly Christian social network.”

Show The Love!

2009-02-13T08:09:00.000-08:00

Here's an idea that could change the way you do Valentine's Day forever. Call you family together tomorrow for your usual celebration, then, afterwards, discuss something that you all could do together as a “Valentine for Jesus” – a special offering, an outreach or a service project in which everyone participates. Make this day a time to give love too!

All My Love

2009-02-12T07:21:00.001-08:00

I love you. No, I really mean it. I do. At least, that’s what I’m working on these days.

I’m not sure who’s reading this right now, but, you might be someone who’s a part of that small inner circle of people that I love desperately. I’ll take a moment in the next few days, as Valentine’s Day approaches, to let you know how much I love you. Martha, you’re so easy to love. I can say without any hesitation that my love for you is limitless. You’ve been the love of my life for 30 years, and I long for at least 30 more. Anne and Matt, I could have never imagined the amazing people you’ve become. You’ve been such a joy! I’ve always loved you so much, and I always will. Robbie, I’m thankful for the man that you are, and that Anne picked you to be a part of our family. You’re not only my son-in-law, you’re my friend. And then there’s Josiah. How can anybody work their way so deep in my heart in just a few months? You’re G-Diddy’s little man. To my Mom, and all my other family members, I’m so blessed to have you in my life. All my close friends, you know who you are, are a source of encouragement and strength and a whole lot of good times. These are all the folks that I have no problem loving. Even during those challenging times, I can’t let go of them.

But we have a higher calling. If we want to love like Jesus loved, we’re not allowed to write anyone off – not the unknown and, definitely not the unlovable. We can’t hold them at arm’s length, and we can’t walk away, because that’s the way He loves. And I’m really glad about that. Because, you see, I’m one of the unlovable ones. Because of my failures and frailties, He could have given up on me. If I were God, I’d have probably already turned my back, out of sight, out of mind. But He loves me so much that He gave, and keeps on giving and giving. Thank God.

I’m challenged to love like Jesus loves. Not just on Valentine’s Day, when loving is the thing to do. But all the time, no matter the situation, no matter the circumstances.

When clouds veil sun, and disaster comes
Oh, my soul! Oh, my soul!
When waters rise, and hope takes flight
Oh, my soul! Oh, my soul! Oh, my soul!

Ever faithful, ever true, You I know
You never let go. You never let go.
You never let go. You never let go,

When clouds brought rain, and disaster came.
Oh, my soul! Oh, my soul!
When waters rose, and hope had flown
Oh, my soul! Oh, my soul! Oh, my soul!

Oh, my soul overflows.
Oh, what love, oh, what love.
Oh, my soul fills with hope,
Perfect love that never lets go.

Oh, what love, oh, what love
Oh, what love, oh, what love
In joy and pain, in sun and rain
You’re the same. Oh, You never let go.

“You Never Let Go”
Written by David Crowder, Mike Hogan & Mike Dodson

Super Sunday!

2009-01-29T10:28:00.000-08:00

It's almost here! One of my favorite days of the year – Super Bowl Sunday! It really doesn’t matter that neither the Arizona Cardinals nor the Pittsburgh Steelers are among my favorite teams, the days leading up to the Big Game really get me fired up. All the hype, the prognostications, and the analysis is often more exciting than the game itself.

A couple of Super Bowls ago, one of the pre-game interviews completely captured my attention. Within the professional sports culture, we hear so many tales of boys behaving badly, so when I heard Samkon Gado’s story, I was amazed.

When Martha and I began writing our second book, I knew that we needed to include Samkon’s story. We spent over an hour on the phone with him, and it was refreshing and inspiring. He’s walking by faith, trusting God to move him day-by day to the place that he can serve Him and others most effectively. “I don’t want to presume about where the Lord will have me serve,” he said. “I’ll just wait and let God unfold it for me one piece at a time. I’m praying, ‘God, just send me wherever I can be the most useful.’”

His NFL career has been a roller coaster ride. The year after this video appeared, Samkon was released by the Houston Texans and signed for a brief stint with the Miami Dolphins. Then, when the Dolphins didn't renew his contract this year, he began preparations to enter medical school. But before he could complete the entrance requirements, the St. Louis Rams called on him to finish the season with them. Just this week, Samkon signed a new contract with the Rams for the upcoming 2009 season.

In the interview with us, Samkon, the son of African missionaries, told us that he knew that God had called Him to someday return to his native Nigeria as a medical missionary. Until that door opens, God has burned a picture into Samkon’s heart. He sees it when he closes his eyes at night, when the cheering crowd is quiet and the stadium’s lights are dark. “I see an image of people living in absolute misery, with no hope, and no future. God wants me to bring hope and healing to those people. He wants me to show them Jesus.”

When "Simple" Becomes "Something More"

2009-01-14T06:13:00.000-08:00

This post started simply enough. It was just going to provide a link for you to hear an interview that we did on WCTS radio in Minnesota. And, here it is...

http://www.box.net/shared/h6evftms1e

Then, in the midst of a bit of personal reminiscence and some inspired illumination, my very basic post began to evolve. I thought it would be nice to close my initial entry with a “shout out” to Alex. He’s our “technical guru” who set up the download of the interview from the WCTS website. What I was struggling with, he made very easy. It didn’t cost me anything other than the expected ribbing from Alex, that it was such a simple task that I should have been able to figure it out for myself. He enjoys doing that whenever he gets the chance.

Alex and his wife Sara are a part of our Sunday School class for families. We love having them in there every week! They’re newlyweds and bring a unique perspective to our class. But our history goes much further back than that. Alex has been in SOME class that we were teaching since he was in middle school. Through his teen years, and now into adulthood, we’ve watched him become a man, and he has become my friend. But, wait, it gets even better. Alex’s mother, Jackie is a part of our Sunday morning class, too. We first became acquainted with her just a few years back (thirty-something?!), when we were her youth pastors and she was just in high school. You can always depend on Alex’s Aunt Mae, another of our youth ministry alumnae, and Uncle Roger in that Sunday School classroom. They have become among our very dearest friends. And, then, in the morning worship service, Martha and I find a seat next to Alex’s grandmother, Lula, who greets us with a big smile and a hug.

So I started thinking about how unusual that probably is, in today’s culture and in a big city with a large transient military population. But, then I realized that, though it’s noteworthy now, it’s probably what church was always intended to be - people sharing life and faith, encouragement and accountability. Church offers lifetime relationships that serve as a springboard for each of us to be about our mission. It’s not about a building, or even a Sunday School class or a morning worship service, even though those things are important. Church is about people and our connection to each other. The book of Acts calls it “koinonia.” I’m thankful that God thought it was so important that he placed people like Alex and his family in my life.

No Longer Silent!

2008-12-24T10:01:00.000-08:00

Sometimes in life, we feel that our prayers are met with a heavy silence.
And in our culture of instant gratification and immediate response, we don’t take kindly to that silence from God.

The past few months have been a particularly difficult and challenging season for us, culminating in emergency surgery for our two-day-old grandson, a three-week stay in neonatal intensive care, and a diagnosis of Cystic Fibrosis.

As we walked through each difficulty, and especially as we prayed for and hurt with our children and first grandchild, I found myself begging God for “a word, or a sign.”

And then, a side note in a sermon brought me up short. It was this: When God told Zacharias that he would father a son, and Zacharias was struck dumb, it had been literally thousands of years since God had spoken to men. For thousands of years, His people had worshipped Him in the temple and served Him according to ancient instructions in their scriptures...and not heard one word from Him.

For those of us who are battling difficulty, disease, or disappointment, for those of us who feel that we are just muddling through, those who, like me, have been asking God to give us a word, a sign, the Christmas story holds a magnificent message. God is no longer silent, nor will He ever be again.

Here is the word we long for:
And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us.
John 1:14

Here is the sign we so desperately seek:
This shall be a sign unto you. You shall find the Babe, wrapped in swaddling clothes, lying in a manger.
Luke 2:12

Praying that in Jesus you will truly find everything you seek –
Martha

Everything Changed

2008-12-15T05:40:00.000-08:00

Change. We’ve heard that word a lot lately. President-elect Barack Obama won the recent election with a promise that he would be an agent of change in the White House. His opponent, John McCain, proudly sported the label of “maverick”, seeking to project an image of a candidate who would have a different approach to things.

As powerful as our heads of government are, the real change that they can affect is miniscule compared to what happened in Bethlehem over two thousand years ago. So many pre-conceived ideas and comfortable methodologies were forever altered when Jesus was born in that manger.

Even the most faithful were shaken when He was born. Their long-anticipated Messiah arrived in the most humble of circumstances. Quietly, without fanfare, a King was born. That was a stunning change from what had been expected. He lived His life in a carpenter’s shop, not a palace. He didn’t introduce His ministry with a blaring, extravagant campaign. Even His death produced a drastic change of peoples’ perspectives. The cross, once a morbid representation of death, was indelibly altered to become a symbol of His love.

Jesus’ words provoked even more radical changes in the traditional way of thinking. Love your enemies? How was that even possible? He said the last will be first and the first will be last. He proclaimed a kingdom where the meek would inherit the earth, the persecuted would be rewarded, and the merciful would be the ones who obtained mercy.

But the greatest change of all that Jesus introduced was what He brought you and me. Because He was born, because of what He had to offer us, our lives, destined for destruction and death, were suddenly overflowing with hope and promise. Beyond His miraculous birth and His stirring words was His love. Emmanuel – “God with us” – sought us in order to change us. His changes are not surface or superficial. He came to bring us a revolutionary way of living, today and eternally.

Thoughts About Giving Thanks

2008-11-22T02:52:00.000-08:00

I believe that Thanksgiving may be my favorite holiday of the year. And, it’s not just about the food and the football, even though that, alone, is enough to put a smile on my face. Our house has always been a gathering place at Thanksgiving. Family and friends stop by during the day, and, together, we acknowledge that God has really been good to us all. We always have a houseful, coming and going from morning until midnight. All ages and all races and nationalities are represented in our home that day, with one common, overriding theme. It may not be stated in so many words, but there’s an atmosphere there that’s undeniable. We’re blessed.

I wanted to take some time and space here to express some random thoughts and ideas about my favorite time of the year.

Being Thankful
Your mom was right – always say “please” and “thank you.” Whether she realized it or not though, that seemingly insignificant act has far more impact than simply socially acceptable behavior. Developing a thankful heart, as well as an attitude of ungratefulness, is a habit. So, fill your home with thankfulness! It starts with Mom and Dad – saying “please,” “thank you,” and “you’re welcome.” Then declare it to be a family trait - “Our family expresses thanks!” Expressions of thankfulness are like the reins and the bridle in the horse’s mouth. They will turn the tide of attitude in your home.

"So then, just as you received Christ Jesus as Lord, continue to live in Him, rooted and built up in Him, strengthened in the faith as you were taught, and overflowing with thankfulness."
Colossians 2:6-7 (NIV)

How Many Ways To Worship?
One activity you can try with your family is to discover every way you can think of to worship God. Almost any age group can participate in this exercise that expands your family’s concept of worship. And it can be a project that stretches over an extended period of time, because, in reality, there are limitless responses to this. Feel free to allow your kids to use their imaginations.

The book of Psalms is the perfect place to teach your children what worship looks like and sounds like. Give your family the assignment to search through the entire book in order to prompt them to find all the different ways to worship. The list in almost inexhaustible, and offers such a variety of postures and practices that anyone can find something that’s a comfortable expression for them – be still, sing, shout, clap your hands, stand, sit, lie down, leap, and on and on. For school age children, the visual of writing all the responses on butcher paper or posterboard makes a real impact.

The Thanksgiving Tradition
The original Thanksgiving dinner began with each person having seven kernels of corn on his or her plate, to commemorate the time of famine when that was all each colonist had to eat each day for months…after eating those, they gave thanks for God’s bountiful blessing, and began the feast. Why not make that a tradition that reminds us of the abundance of God’s goodness? Or, go around the table with each person offering a sentence prayer thanking God for something they are specifically, especially thankful for.

If you have any meaningful Thanksgiving traditions in your home, we’d love for you to share them with us. You can tell us about them in the comments here, or, for you more private types, you can email us at MarthaandGreg@aol.com. Have a blessed Thanksgiving weekend!

The Apron

2008-11-12T11:05:00.001-08:00

It’s a faded brown gingham apron, hand-stitched, trimmed with a ribbon and a row of equally faded pinkish ric-rac. They say she never was without her apron, and sure enough, the photo I have shows her wearing a similar one as she stands beside her husband in a field, looking stoically at the camera in the fashion of her day.
Her life was more difficult than I can fathom. Her husband was a circuit-riding preacher, and, with their eight children, they moved from place to place, wherever he was needed, picking cotton on other people’s land, eating and sleeping and living in temporary houses borrowed from other people for the length of their stay.
She was a tiny woman, under five feet tall, weighing about 85 pounds, but she drug the huge sack, weighing more than she did by the time it was full of cotton, behind her as she worked her way up and down the rows in the sun. Singing.
My husband’s great grandmother, Nettie Stiewig, worked hard laboring in the fields, helped educate her children, cooked meals, did laundry, and somehow found time to create some of the most exquisite embroidered and crocheted linens I have ever seen.
But the story of her life, the one thing that I really know about her, is that she sang.
Up and down the rows, back bent, fingers raw to the point of bleeding, she worked in the heat and the dust with her husband and children toiling nearby.
But instead of complaining about the work, or wishing she could express her homemaker’s artistic heart in a house of her own, Grandma sang joyful, unending hymns to the Savior she loved.
In doing so, she left a legacy that lives still in the hearts of four generations after her.
We’ve been talking a lot in our Sunday School class about our personal stories, and how they are part of God’s big, eternal story. We all want to do that One Great Thing for Jesus, and wonder if, should the opportunity arise, we will recognize it, and be up for the challenge. Sometimes I think that One Great Thing may not be that obvious, even to ourselves, as we somehow trudge from day to day, task to task, waiting for “Something” to happen..
But when I see that apron, where I have lovingly hung it in my kitchen, I hear the message of her life, still powerful in the heart of a great-granddaughter-in-law who never even met her.
My work, through all the little moments and tasks of life, becomes worship when my heart is full of praise to Him.
The apron touches me, and fills me with the hope that the memory of my life which will echo through the generations after me will be the same as hers: “She worshipped Jesus while she worked. She sang.”

Martha

A Public Service Announcement

2008-10-27T14:41:00.000-07:00

As a public service, we're providing a clock that will count down the number of shopping days until Christmas. Just click on this link and watch the seconds pass by. You're that much closer to the crowds and the craziness that rolls around every year about this time. As of this moment, the clock tells us we have 59 more days left. Fifty-nine days sounds like you still have a while, but you know how time flies! So, we have a suggestion. How about getting a jump on the whole thing and take care of a few people on your list right now.

Setting Up Stones would make a GREAT gift this Christmas! Just go to Setting Up Stones: A Parent's Guide to Making Your Home a Place of Worship at Christianbook.com and you can place your order now. With just a little bit of effort and consideration, this could be the best gift you've ever given.

Wives, give this book to your husband along with a little note about how they get so many things right that it might be about as useful as that funny-looking tie he got last year, but JUST IN CASE, he might read it anyway.

Husbands, along with the book include a single red rose, and tell your wife that it's your intention this year that you will work together to make home the kind of place she has always wanted it to be. (Now, THAT, gentlemen, is smooth!)

Grandparents, give the book to your kids along with a promise that you will never again dispense unsolicited parenting advice. (Let the book say it for you!)

Give copies of the book to your friends and neighbors. You KNOW how their kids are!

Seriously, now, we pray that Setting Up Stones will be a blessing to you and everyone you give it to this Christmas.

For Those Of You Who Love Football & Great Stories

2008-10-13T14:24:00.000-07:00

It all started when Tom Brady went down with a season-ending injury in Week 1, and New England became just another team. Even with Peyton Manning leading them, the Colts are just so-so. This afternoon, ESPN reported that Tony Romo is out for at least four weeks and, so, it doesn't look too good for the Cowboys. Just six weeks deep, this has already been an interesting NFL season. Last Monday night, I watched the Vikings upset the Saints, and literally flinched when Cedric Griffin delivered the hit of at least that week on the Saints' Billy Miller.

Cedric went to high school at Holmes in San Antonio, where Martha has taught 22 years, and both Annie and Matt, our kids, attended there with Ced. As a matter of fact, Matt loved the school so much, he's back there teaching English. Cedric played football with Matt for the Huskies, back in the program's glory days. Don't look now, it's not as pretty as it used to be. Matt, as an underclassman then, had the responsibility of being on the scout team in practice, running next week's opponent's offense to help school the studs starting on defense. Looking back, he'll tell you he never got hit harder in any game than Ced hit him in practice. Even though, as a cornerback, Ced was smaller that most of the guys on defense, he still could bring it.

Seeing Ced's big hit last week brought to my remembrance an article that was written about him while he was at the University of Texas.

Cedric Griffin: Breaking barriers
By Thomas Stepp, University of Texas Media Relations

Late in the summer of 2001, Cedric Griffin walked into the Longhorns team meeting room for the first time as a freshman. At first glance, he may have appeared quiet, stern and almost unapproachable to his fellow freshmen, but what his new teammates, including his future roommate Matt Nordgren, may not have realized is how much there was to discover.

"Cedric is one of the toughest guys you'll ever try to get to know, but I think that once you do, you'll be very happy with who you meet," Nordgren said. "It's a special thing, because he doesn't let many people in. He's very loyal. I think that's one of his best qualities. When you do get in, he'll do anything for you, anything in the world."

Trust and loyalty are two of the biggest qualities in getting to know Cedric Griffin. It was engrained at an early age as he ended up doing much for himself because of strained relations with his family, most of which is in southern Mississippi.

At age 10, he and his mother made their way to San Antonio, and although he admits he has found it difficult to ask for help from anyone, he would eventually receive one offer he felt he could not turn down.

"I don't talk to my real parents that much," Griffin said. "I live with a family in San Antonio who asked if I wanted to stay with them -- the Johnsons. I stayed with them in high school, so they are my closest family. I would call them a mother and a father figure. I 'm really close to my natural mom, we just haven't gotten along too well all the time."

In the Johnson household, comprised of father Tony, mother Sandi and son Anthony, Griffin found true trust and loyalty. He credits them fully for his successes, especially Anthony, one of his teammates at Holmes High School in San Antonio, who became his best friend.

"If you're his friend, you've got a friend for life," Tony Johnson said. "He'll go to bat for you, he'll go fight for you, and if he hears someone saying something about you, he'll step right up and straighten that out quickly.

"He has a hard time expressing himself, but when he does, it really comes out. It can be hard for him to do that. I guess as a child, he had to hold his emotions in so much. He'll let you know that he loves you, and he's just so thankful. He's just that type of person."

Beginning as teammates in Pop Warner football, Anthony and Cedric hit it off, and he was gradually accepted into the Johnson family, starting with an introduction to Tony and continuing with rides home from practice.

Eventually, during Griffin's sophomore year in high school, the Johnsons would extend an invitation for him to live with them in order to provide stability to the special person they recognized him to be.

"They're really supportive and they came to all of my games," Griffin described. "Even today, whenever I want to go down there, I can do it and just relax. They call me all the time and are just a really loving family."

With the benefit of support from the Johnsons, one night in their house became a distinct turning point. The night he took the SAT, it was Anthony who stayed up with Cedric to help him prepare.

"We sat there with training manuals, and I helped him where I could," Anthony recalled. "He knew some of the areas, and I knew some, so I helped as much as I could, and he just put a lot of effort into it. He trusted me, and we just got it done."

When the results were in, Griffin was on his way to play for The University of Texas.

"That was the happiest I've ever been in my life, because I knew I was going to college." Griffin recalled. "I knew I was going to have a chance to do what I wanted to do, and I knew I could repay him if everything worked out right. He helped me get here, and he's the reason why I'm here, honestly."

However, Tony and Anthony are quick to turn that credit around. Tony remembers a time when someone asked if Cedric made it to Texas because of the Johnson family.

"No, I'm here because of Cedric," he told them. "I'm sitting in this stadium seat because Cedric got me the tickets."

"I was there because of Cedric, not the other way around," he then explained. "He's there on his own initiative. I wish people could understand fully how hard it was for him to get where he is. If someone else takes credit, that's just silly. He's there because of him."

Anthony and Cedric consider each other brothers, and with the Johnsons' support, Griffin was able turn his strong ability to focus to his passion -- the game of football. Tony says that even from age 11, Cedric had his goals in place.

"When he is focused on it, you can forget it," Tony said. "I don't care what it is. I've never seen him give up. I've told him there are challenges out there that sometimes you won't meet, but that doesn't mean you have to quit trying. You don't just shoot for the moon, you can shoot for another galaxy, and he does. Sometimes it's almost an obsession compared to people who don't have goals. It does amaze me."

"Since he was a little kid, Cedric's been committed to football," Anthony followed. "Whatever he puts his mind to, that's what he does. From Pop Warner to middle school to high school, he's excelled at it, and it's what he's always wanted to do. Now he wants to go to the NFL, and that's his next step."

The Johnson family could not be prouder of Griffin, and no one would know him better than Anthony, who has seen him from all sides as they grew up together.

"It's like day and night away from football," Anthony laughed. "He can be so goofy. A lot of people don't see that side, because he's all rough and tough on the football field, but in the house, he's just a silly person."

So by the help of one family, Griffin found a second. He arrived at Texas and was embraced by teammates Matt Nordgren, Brian Carter, Michael Huff and the coaching staff, most notably defensive backs coach Duane Akina.

Firmly placed on the right track, Griffin knows that one day he will return to his original home of Natchez, Miss. Despite all he has been through, he still views it as just that -- home.

"All of my family is there," explained Griffin. "I'm the only one out here right now, but it strengthens me. I want to go back to Mississippi, help my family out and go out there and live. That's where I'm from, and that's where I would like to be."

A youth and community studies major, Griffin's greatest hope is to be able to help those who are in need, especially those who have helped him.

"I want to do something with children or at a community house. I want to have a chance to give back. I hope I'm fortunate enough to give back to people who have done for me. They're the ones who have set up centers and things like that. I just want to go out into the community, see what the problems are and try to help people."

A recent problem everyone is familiar with in that region is the devastation caused by Hurricane Katrina. Griffin received word early that his family was safe, but that did not deter him from wanting to help those he does not know.

"The little money I do have, I donate to the Red Cross," Griffin admitted. "It's hard times right now and everybody needs help, so I definitely want to do it."

Underneath the exterior is where you find the true Cedric Griffin. When asked to describe himself, he had this to say:

"I really feel like I'm a sensitive person, and a caring and loving person, but a lot of people don't believe that just because of the way they see me. Football brings your other personality out because you want to be mean, you want to try to be hard. That's what a lot of people perceive me as, but I'm just a really cool, caring guy to tell you the truth. That's what I think I am."

And he's not the only one.

We got to see a lot of Cedric and Anthony (AJ) back in their high school days. They both faithfully attended the weekly Fellowship of Christian Athletes' meetings that Matt led and we were adult sponsors. They showed up at our house for parties and get-togethers. Sean Jensen of the Pioneer Press wrote an article about Ced since he became a Minnesota Viking. In the article, Sandi Johnson said that the two boys were "like twins." And, that was exactly how they acted, except for the fact that AJ had sandy hair and freckles and was about four inches taller. But the Johnsons made certain that Ced was a part of their family. They provided all the clothes and school supplies that he needed, and the encouragement and discipline that kept him going. Now in his third year in the NFL, he can look back at his time as a part of the Johnson family for providing that impetus to persevere and succeed.

In Sean Jensen's article, Ced says of his life's goal, "It's just all about being a man. Just manning up and taking ownership of what you made. I know I have to be responsible for my actions." That's a valuable lesson to learn. And it manifests itself in many more ways than one big hit.

So What Do We Do With Halloween?

2008-10-13T12:50:00.001-07:00

It’s one of those areas of controversy within the church that causes discussions confrontations, arguments, and, heaven forbid (and it does!), finger-pointing and judgmental attitudes. And it’s all about the kids.

So, as Christians, what do we do with Halloween? Can we ignore it and pretend it’s not there? That’s pretty difficult when on the evening of the 31st kids in costume are banging on our doors demanding candy. I’m sure, no matter how hard you try to keep that undercover, your kids are going to notice that kind of gimmick. I found out, anyway, that it was never a good idea to try to ignore troublesome situations when it came to my own family.

Halloween, without a doubt, has pagan roots. Over 2,000 years ago, the Druids celebrated their new year on November 1. The night before was dedicated to driving out the evil spirits so that the new year would be prosperous and productive. Costumes, bonfires and animal sacrifices, even of the human variety, were common practices. In 835 AD, Pope Gregory IV reclaimed November 1 for Christianity, proclaiming it to be the official All Saints’ Day.

To address all the opinions about acknowledging Halloween would take far too much space on this blog. And, I really don’t think it’s my job to convince anyone to accept my position anyway. I would like to suggest a few alternatives, though, that could turn a typically unholy day into something that actually can bring God glory and bring your family together.

NO FEAR
Since the primary goal of Halloween is to inflict at least some measure of fear, why not redeem the time to discuss with your family what God says about fear.

“For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.” II Timothy 1:7 (NLT)

“Don’t be afraid, my people. Be glad now and rejoice, for the Lord has done great things.” Joel 2:21 (NLT)

CELEBRATE THE SAINTS!
All Saints’ Day is a great time to remember those who have remarkably lived their lives for God. Talk with your family about those in the Bible, throughout church history and even in your own ancestry.

You might, also, want to read an article that appeared in Christianity Today, written by Harold Myra. It’s entitled “Is Halloween a Witches' Brew?: Or Have Christians Been Spooked Out of Celebrating A Part of Their Rich Tradition?” http://www.christianitytoday.com/ct/2000/octoberweb-only/42.0.html

So there’s a good start! And, now it’s your turn. Is there anything your family has done that has brought positive light to a dark day in October? Let us know!

You, Me and Technology

2008-09-12T11:02:00.000-07:00

Let’s hear it for the oldest guy on Facebook. I believe this is worth a rousing round of applause, if not a standing ovation.

For those of you of my generation who may be living in a cave, Facebook is an “online social network” that boasts over 100,000,000 active members worldwide. My initial reaction to the whole concept was founded from my normal overblown conspiratorial point of view. I was certain that this would bring about the eventual ruination of life as we know it. More and more, as I heard people talk about it, my attitude shifted to smugness. Facebook was too silly for me. I would never lower myself to that level.

The very coolest of the marketing folks began telling me that this was an excellent way of networking. With a book coming out, our presence on Facebook would give us access to an abundance of potential readers. I reasoned that we just didn’t need any of this new fly-by-night technology. We’ll do just fine with the traditional methods of reaching people, thank you very much.

Those Facebook people are pretty smart. After all, it does have its roots at Harvard. You can’t access anyone’s Facebook page unless you’re a member. So, when someone referred me to some information that could be found on their Facebook profile, I was left completely out of the loop. Denied the free flow of information, about six months ago, I was forced to initiate a covert entry into the world of Facebook. I joined, but I reasoned that if I left my profile absolutely blank, nobody would notice I was there.

Somehow, my friend Joe in Tennessee, found me under some online rock. I received an e-mail from Facebook that said Joe had “added you as a friend on Facebook. We need to confirm that you know Joe in order for you to be friends on Facebook.”

So what do you do with that? Joe is my friend, and I’ve really missed seeing him since he and his family left San Antonio. To ignore him online before 100,000,000 people would be absolutely rude. But I wasn’t ready to come out of hiding yet, so I tucked the e-mail back into my mailbox until I decided what my participation in this online phenomenon was going to look like.

I cringed when a few days later I found another “friendship request” in my mailbox. This was from Sarah. I’ve known her since she was a little girl, and I officiated at her wedding a couple of years ago. That absolutely obligates somebody to publicly declare friendship, I do believe. So I confirmed the fact that Sarah was, indeed, my friend. And while I was at it, I thought it was only proper that I acknowledge Joe, too.

Within a couple of hours I checked my e-mail, only to find out that Sarah had left me a message on my otherwise blank Facebook page. She was just letting me know how happy she was that she was my very first Facebook friend. Sentiments like that just make you feel good.

And, that opened up the floodgates. Within the next couple of days, about 50 other folks just wanted to be my friend. Some of them I hadn’t heard from in a long time, and it was great to find out what they were up to. Others invited me to join special interest Facebook groups they were involved in, and some shared pictures of their families. I was introduced to “friends-of-friend”, and further expanded that phenomenon known as “six degrees of Singleton.” Despite my early rants, chides and misgivings, I was now beginning to feel just fine in this place.

Community is a great thing. It’s what Jesus had in mind when He laid out the groundwork for the first church. Being with people you know and love, depending on each other, and declaring your commitment to each other is a comfortable thing. But it’s also challenging, in a very good way. That commitment is sometimes tested and you’re called on to be accountable or to hold others accountable. But even that is worth it.

Dietrich Bonhoeffer, the German theologian who was martyred because he resisted Adolph Hitler wrote: “Because God has already laid the only foundation of our fellowship, because God has bound us together in one body with other Christians in Jesus Christ, long before we entered into common life with them, we enter into that common life not as demanders but as thankful recipients. We thank God for what He has done for us. We thank God for giving us brethren who live by His call, by His forgiveness, and His promise.”

I’m thankful for others that God has brought into my life, in fellowship with Him and each other. Because of these people, because of you, my life is rich and I am blessed!

AIRPORT ENCOUNTER

2008-07-25T09:26:00.001-07:00

His name was Peter, he was seven years old and he was on his way back home to New York City. That’s about all we knew about that little boy from what he told us, but what we witnessed told plenty more.

During our recent trip to the East Coast, we spent a total of about twenty-four hours in an airport or on one of a variety of styles of aircraft we sampled. When you’re stuck in an airport, watching the “Departures” monitor while your flight time gets pushed back further and further, or when you’re on a runway waiting for your turn to take off, you have two choices. You can let the whole situation eat you alive, or you can sit back, make the best of it and people-watch. I usually choose the latter.

There is nowhere else you can go and observe such a wide swatch of life. People are coming and going, interacting and retreating into a shell, and enjoying each other’s company and getting on each other’s frazzled nerves. I always find the parent-child encounters to be the most interesting.

That’s how I met Peter. He was a bit small for his age, but he made up for it with his brilliance. He, apparently, was an airport observer like me, but he had the guts to say exactly what I was thinking. That provoked more than one “shhhhhhhhhhhhh” from his attentive Mom. Dad disappeared for a while, and I just assumed he was seeking an escape from the boredom. After a few minutes, though, he came back with a package under his arm, and he tossed it to Peter. “Here you go, Buddy,” he said. “Check this out!”

I immediately recognized the contents of Peter’s gift. It was a copy of the brand new Athlon College Football Annual that I had been thumbing through myself, earlier when I was at the magazine rack. You would have thought that Dad had uncovered buried treasure and placed it in his son’s hands. I have never seen such a display of unbridled enthusiasm.

Peter got down on his knees, using his chair as a podium, and began to drink in the contents of the magazine. The cover itself elicited his first observations.

“They have L.S.U. rated #9?! That’s ridiculous!” he exclaimed. “They’re the defending national champs!”

“They lost a lot of good players, Pete,” said Dad.

“How about number 72?”

“That was Glenn Dorsey,” said Dad. “Gone!”

“OH MY GOSH! He was the best defensive player in college football!”

“He’s with the Kansas City Chiefs now.”

Peter began daydreaming about his NFL team now. “I wish he was wearing New York Jets green.”

He opened the magazine and continued. “Do you think Florida can win it all, Dad?”

“They have some great players, like the Heisman Trophy winner.”

“Tim Tebow! What a great quarterback!”

I looked over at Peter’s Mom and she was smiling.

“He really knows his stuff,” I said.

“We really didn’t try to make him that way. He and his dad just talk about it and he drinks it in.”

Peter stood up quickly and raised his 200-page magazine high over his head. “Dad, I can’t wait until we can sit down together and read every bit of this!”

Could I ever identify with Peter! I had had the same reaction when I was his age and my dad brought me a new sports magazine. And I can remember when Matt and I would pore over every page of the new Texas Football issue together. I realize now that it’s never really the sport itself that makes those moments so memorable. Peter, Matt and I were passionate about it because it was an opportunity that we got to spend with our dads, sharing thoughts and ideas with each other. Sports aren’t the connection. Relationship is.

So, when it comes to passing on our faith to our children, we earn the privilege with the time we’ve spent sharing life together. Matt told me just the other day, “I don’t think that, at the time, I always got what we were talking about. But, I knew that if it was important enough for you to spend time with me talking about it, then it really must have been important.”

Do you want your kids to share your passion for Christ? Do you want them to be attentive to what you have to say about your faith? Here’s a simple equation - time = priority. Make time to talk to your kids. Your stories reveal to them your heart.

Greg

MILE MARKER 502, BUT THE JOURNEY’S NOT OVER

2008-06-27T13:23:00.001-07:00

“Woo-Hoo!” I exclaimed as we left the restaurant, giving Greg a playful punch on the arm. “Show me to the shoe department!”

We had just been treated to a lovely dinner by our son, celebrating the first paycheck of his adult, working-man career. Our youngest was officially on his own, and I was thrilled for him, and very proud.

Parenting is a task that involves constant transitions, some of which are much more comfortable than others. We rejoice at that first word and first step, at drivers’ licenses and first dates, but we also struggle as those little feet disappear into that Pre-K classroom, or as we drive away from a college campus, leaving that big-eyed freshman sitting forlornly on the side of a dorm room bed.

This is the time of year when my senior students begin to express frustration with their parents, and their parents wonder whatever happened to their wonderful, compliant, cooperative teen. That’s because they are suddenly in the throes of one of those painful transitions, the natural tug-of-war involved in the transfer of power as children take on new privileges and responsibilities as young adults.

We’ve covered the Golden Rule and table manners and speed limit and following distance, and our kids don’t even need our help with car payments or groceries any more.
And yet, they are no less in our thoughts, no less in our prayers, no less the objects of our love and longing for all of God’s best, than they were when we snuggled their downy little heads and rocked them to sleep as babies.

But that night, I lay in bed blankly realizing that, indeed, I would not be checking to see if that silver Ford truck was in the driveway when I awoke in the night, nor would Dr. Pepper be a permanent part of the grocery list. My role as a mother had once again changed.

As I waited for sleep to come, I also realized that, while one phase of our parenting had ended, there was a whole new era open for exploration, one that will require no less love, no less commitment, and no less earnest seeking of Godly wisdom than the ones before, as we set out to be a resource and encouragement to our adult children.

Knowing how closely I hold my own children in my heart, I find great comfort in the thought that my Heavenly Father’s love for me will never be diminished, either. And I find a great challenge in learning to parent well as seasons change in a relationship that simply does not end.

Martha

Who's Your Daddy?

2008-06-13T15:21:00.001-07:00

It makes a huge difference, you know.

I only had my Daddy for seventeen years, but I feel the power of his impact on my life every day, even 42 years later. He was never too busy to talk to me, to read to me, to swing me around or give me a wild ride around the back yard, clinging to an old bedspread. He let me watch him work, and hand him tools, and I was happy just to sit beside him watching thunderheads build in the distance on hot summer nights, or stand at the window watching snowflakes fall. But the most amazing, life-altering thing my father did for me is this: he told me who I was. Over and over, in words and deeds, he told me that I am capable, I am honorable, I am worthy of being loved, and because I believed him, I was free to try to meet his challenge to live a life unafraid to give love.

My children have an amazing father, too. For 28 years, I have watched Greg invest all of the very best of himself into Annie and Matt. No matter what demands business or ministry might place on his time, his first effort, his best creativity, went into the priority of their lives. He provided for their physical needs, but even more, he saw to it that they had access every moment to his attention and his participation in what interested them. Whether it was watching the Muppet Movie 300 times with Annie, shooting baskets or reading sports books with Matt, or never missing a play or a game for either of them, they always had the great gift of their dad’s joyful, approving presence. As he planned wonderful trips, as he disciplined and taught, as he intentionally began conversations about God and life and truth and their roles in God’s world, Greg, too, gave his children the amazing gift. Today, as young adults, they are people of faith, sensitive to the needs of those around them, filled with the courage of their convictions, confident of God’s calling on their lives, living with great joy, in large part because their father told them who they are.

Sadly, I know far too many young people who have not had the benefit of a Godly, committed father to tell them who they are. It breaks my heart to see these kids struggle to figure out who they are, to wrestle with the question of their own value, because their fathers are absent, or, worse, abusive. That need to be valued, to be taught, to be challenged, and to be enjoyed is what I believe drives so many of our teens today to make the unfortunate decisions that send their lives into tailspins.

But the wonderful news is that, no matter what the circumstances in our homes, no matter what our age or the situations of life right now, we all have a Father, and He has told us in no uncertain terms who we are.
“For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in Him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” John 3:16

“But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name. ” John 1:12

“And because ye are sons, God hath sent forth the Spirit of his Son into your hearts, crying, Abba, Father.” Galatians 4:6

On this Fathers Day weekend, our prayer is that we all will listen anew as our wonderful Abba tells us who we are in Him.

Martha

Just Call Me G-Diddy

2008-05-28T09:18:00.000-07:00

Yep, it’s true. I’m going to be somebody’s grandpa. It really seems difficult to believe until I’m standing in front of the mirror to shave in the mornings. And then I realize I guess I really am old enough after all.

When Annie first called us to give us the news, there was a flurry of conversation between Annie, Martha and myself about who would get to tell whom about the upcoming blessed event. After all the territory was established, I got to tell the girl who gives me my coffee at Starbucks, and a total stranger who was in line in front of me at the grocery store checkout. Thus, the pecking order was set, and I understood completely where grandpas ranked.

Ever since the news broke, I’ve had a lot of people offer their congratulations, and a few more who found it necessary to inform me that it means I’m really getting old. But, most of them asked me one question – what is the baby going to call me. I hadn’t even considered that until so many folks started asking, but I soon decided it was worth my attention.

“Grandpa” is much too pedestrian, and “grandfather,” much too formal. “Gramps” is a sitcom character and “Pops” runs a bait stand at the coast. We can’t use “Poppa” because Martha and I both called our grandfathers that. I searched the internet and found a website that exhausted all the possible names for grandfathers, even allowing for people to make their own suggestions. In Norway, it’s “bestpappa.” That might be a bit pretentious, but I like the sentiment. “Big Daddy” could be a 50’s beatnik or, at least, a constant reminder that I needed to stick with my diet. “BopBop?” Isn’t that an anime cartoon character? “Bubba?” Too redneck. The animal names listed, like “Granddog,” “Fish,” “DuckDuck,” and “Turtle” were just too ridiculous to even consider. Then, there was a whole list of them that described unflattering personality traits - “Grumpy,” “Chippy,” “Grunt,” “Kinky” and “Honey” among them.

Right now, I’m leaning toward one that Annie came up with – “G-Diddy.” It’s very cool and current, and it definitely makes a statement. The only problem I foresee is that I would have to buy some expensive sunglasses and a new wardrobe, and trick out my Expedition in order to live up to the hype.

Actually, I’m not going to worry about the whole name thing any more. I’ve decided that the baby will call me whatever he/she wants to call me. Grandfathers rarely have a choice in the matter. One thing I am concerned about, though, is what that grandchild will call me fifty years from now. When that baby grows up and is about to become a grandparent for the first time, I want to be remembered fondly. I want them to remember that I was always joyful and that I was a source of encouragement and strength. I want them to recall my prayers for them, my kind words, and the fact that I was always willing to listen. I want the words “steadfast,” “gracious,” “wise,” and “loving” to be synonymous with my name. I want my grown-up grandchild to remember my passion and my faith. I want to leave that kind of legacy.

Setting Up Stones: A Parent's Guide To Making Your Home A Place Of Worship

2008-05-09T10:50:00.000-07:00

It's available! Our first book, Setting Up Stones, is now ready for online pre-orders. It will still be a couple of months before it's delivered, but you can purchase it now and save a little bit of money. With gas prices the way they are today, that's not a bad thing. The way I figure it, if you buy forty copies of Setting Up Stones at the pre-order discount, you can probably fill your tank once and have plenty of gifts to give your friends and family. You can order the book from amazon.com or christianbook.com. When you go there, search for either "Setting Up Stones" or "Martha and Greg Singleton" and it will take you right to it. If that seems like a lot of trouble just to get a book, then all you have to do is look over to the left-hand column of this page, and under "LINKS", click on "Order SETTING UP STONES from amazon.com" or "Order SETTING UP STONES from christianbook.com". Thank you all for your love and support!

Much More Than A Village

2008-04-01T07:45:00.000-07:00

A few years back, Hillary Clinton usurped an old African proverb and wrote that it “takes a village to raise a child.” I never read her book, so I’m not certain about the assumptions that she made. I can draw my own conclusions from the theme, though. Without hesitation, I know the responsibility of rearing a child lies solely in the hands of the parents. But, I also know that in every child’s life there are others that have the opportunity to make a life-changing impact. So, to say it “takes a village” is much too institutional, too impersonal for my experience. Besides that immediate family, it takes grandparents, aunts and uncles, teachers, pastors, coaches and friends to mold and shape a child’s perspective and decisions. It takes those who are just as committed to that child’s well-being as the parents themselves to come along side and provide love, encouragement and support at every turn along the way.

I know this because I lived it. And, yesterday, I attended the memorial service for someone who, for every day that I’ve lived on this earth, loved me unfailingly and poured herself into my life. Ethel was not my mother, or any blood relation to me at all, but she hardly ever missed any ballgame I played, any concert I sang, and was in the congregation for many sermons I preached. She was there when I graduated, and when I got married. She was at the hospital when both of my children were born, then went to all of their football games and concerts. She sat with me at my Dad’s bedside as he went to be with the Lord. As my own mom stated so well when she spoke at the memorial service yesterday, our families were so intertwined that “sometimes it was hard to know whose kids belonged to whom.” Other than the occasional “You did so well!”, or “I’m so proud of you!”, Ethel didn’t have a lot to say about our connection, but then again, she really didn’t have to. I knew that she loved me as much as she did her own brood of five, and that she was completely committed to the fulfillment of God’s work in my life. She lived her faith in a way that let me know that the greatness of God stretched beyond the walls of my own home. Her life reinforced all that my parents were teaching me, and verified its validity.

Sometimes we get so caught up in our own agendas that we forget that those agendas are simply the starting point of our mission, and not the entirety of it. God’s call on our lives stretches far beyond the walls of our home. He has placed within our realm of influence many others to whom we have a responsibility. If we prescribe to the idea that “it takes a village to raise a child,” then that responsibility is faceless and too easily passed on to someone else. I am called to a commitment to others. God has crafted your days to bring you to a place of influence in someone’s life. It’s much more authentic than a village – it’s you!

A Vision For Your Family

2008-03-04T09:51:00.000-08:00

I have several friends who are graduates of the prestigious school of music at the University of North Texas. Whenever that group gets together, inevitably, they begin to swap stories about a real-life Dallas-area musician who happens to embody all the traits of the stereotypical musician’s caricature – an oblivious, vacant airhead with absolutely nothing on his mind but his music. Durwood is, indeed, a legend.

One day, he was packing his instruments into his van for a gig* he was playing in Amarillo, 300 miles away, up in the Texas Panhandle. Durwood, of course, had given no previous consideration to the logistics of his trip. So, when he saw an 18-wheeler passing by with the name of a company and “Amarillo, Texas” emblazoned on the side, he decided it would be a good thing if he just followed the truck all the way to his destination.

Durwood’s first clue that something was amiss should have been that the trip was taking a lot longer than it should have. But, he really got suspicious when all the road signs were in Spanish. He had followed that truck all the way down into Mexico. Amarillo was now about 600 miles back in the other direction. Durwood was not a man of vision.

I would define “vision” as “knowing who we are and where we’re going.” Proverbs 29:18 says, “Where there is no vision, the people perish.” We’ve often heard this scripture used as a rallying cry for a floundering church. It has motivated congregations to re-focus and set specific goals for worship and ministry. What would it look like if we applied the truth found in that verse in our homes and families? What’s the specific vision that you have for your family?

Prayerfully seek God to determine what He wants your family’s vision to be. That can be as foundational as the attitudes that He wants reflected in your home. And, that’s really a great place to start. As you work to enact those basic characteristics into the structure of your home, you will most likely see some other things begin to happen, too.

In Proverbs 29:18, we are familiar with the King James translation of the word “perish.” Other translations probably more accurately define it as “unrestrained,” “uncontrolled,” or “running wild.” Does that sound familiar? Every home has had at least a few days when “unrestrained” would be a nice way to describe the atmosphere there. When a family has a definite vision in place for how they should look and what their goals are, those days are not as frequent and are more manageable when they do occur.

God’s vision for your home is not only a general idea about how you conduct yourselves. Your family vision also will allow each person under your roof to begin to blossom. It provides fertile ground where each individual can discover his unique talents and abilities. It brings into focus a picture of what each person has to offer to others there, and creates a lab where they can refine those gifts in order to touch their entire world.

Discover God’s vision for your family! Work together to make it a reality. Be determined to establish it in the lives of each individual and the entire household. And, then, watch God bring order and purpose there.

* “job,” in the musician’s lexicon; a shout-out to all my musician friends

A Word For All The Football-Lovin’ Dads

2008-02-02T06:46:00.000-08:00

“I don’t care what you do as long as you keep the kids quiet so I can watch the game.”

That sentiment will be ringing out in homes throughout the country as men everywhere settle in at 5:18 CST Sunday for the kickoff of Super Bowl XLII. Okay, I realize it’s not the most wholesome attitude for any dad who figures to be in the running for Father Of The Year, but, I must admit that I used to occasionally fall into that trap. Come on, now, and be honest. All the rest of you have, too.

So, if we hope to remain beloved to our children, highly esteemed by our wife, and still savor every snap of the football game of the year, what plan should we enact to get the job done? I have some experience in this arena, so as I present my life story, sit back and learn, Grasshopper.

I love sports. Actually, I’m passionate about sports. I have been since my earliest memories as a child, probably because my Dad loved sports so much. When we were blessed with kids in our home, I had two options. I could draw the battle lines and forever be challenged by the inevitable interruptions as I tried to revel in the thrill of victory or the agony of defeat. Or, I could share my passion with my kids. I chose the latter, and, thankfully, it paid off.

Annie was born September 21, 1980, at the Methodist Hospital in San Antonio, which happened to overlook the Oak Hills Country Club, site of the Texas Open. Was it mere coincidence that labor and delivery had a large picture widow that gave a perfect view of the 18th hole? I think not. Annie’s first introduction to this world was a large gallery cheering Lee Trevino on to the championship.

The first gift I purchased for my daughter was a tiny pair of Houston Oilers’ pajamas, and her first Sunday afternoons were spent propped on a pillow in front of the TV in those pajamas as we watched Earl Campbell, Kenny “Snake” Stabler, and Billy “White Shoes” Johnson, march into the NFL playoffs. I didn’t think it could get any better, but then I had a son.

Matt’s bedtime stories were actually about a fictional sports hero I made up who was somewhat of a blend of Jim Thorpe, Superman, and Billy Graham. He always said and did the right things, played all sports and won almost every game in some spectacular fashion. And, he loved Jesus! It must have made some kind of impact, because, in his athletic career, I do believe Matt tried every sport that was out there.

I tried to make the games I was interested in become events for the kids. If the Spurs were in the playoffs, and I wanted to be sure to see the game on television, all of us would plan a family party complete with decorations and arena food. We went to as many games in person as we could, and did all the things that would make it memorable for Annie and Matt.

I got to live out one of my dreams when I worked for a professional football team back in the days of the United States Football League, when football was fun. I should thank our team's head coach, Jim Bates, for making pro football a family affair, encouraging coaches, players and staff to include their families whenever possible. So I took Martha and the kids to work with me as often as I could. Annie will tell you about her memories of running around the track at Alamo Stadium with Jim's son, Jeremy, who is now the quarterbacks coach for the Denver Broncos. Players passed Matt around like he was the football. And Jim entertained the kids with his dead-on Donald Duck imitation.

I can’t tell you how it thrilled me as my kids grew to love sports, too. The memories that we’ve been able to share together are the dividends of the time that I spent passing my passion on...

...In eighth grade, Annie took the skills from our driveway basketball games and, out of the blue, told me, “I think I’m going to try out for the team.” So she laid aside her passion, drama, and worked harder than I’d ever seen her work to make the basketball team. She did it, and even ended up her one-year career as a starter.

...Most people who casually know Annie would be shocked to find out that she’s been an official game statistician at courtside and in the dugout. She’s such a lady that they can’t believe she has that jock side to her.

...I was thrilled when she called me from college to tell me that, as the yearbook sports editor, she had received the top award among all the colleges in Oklahoma.

...Nobody ever worked harder as an athlete than Matt did. He never turned down a challenge. Undersized as a lineman on one of the top high school football programs in the state of Texas, he not only succeeded, he was the team captain.

...He led his school’s Fellowship of Christian Athletes in things that were more important than the game itself. Those guys have gone on to win Olympic gold medals, play in the NFL and play professional baseball, but they still look to Matt for counsel and leadership.

...I can always count on getting a phone call from him when there’s a game on TV that we’ll both be watching.

...Annie and Robbie’s phone call from the Tampa Bay Buccaneers’ game one Monday night, just to make sure I’d look for them on TV

...Annie, the middle school drama teacher, telling me, “I actually think I could coach a middle school football team.”

...Matt coaching football clinics in California

...the memories go an and on.

Whether it’s sports, music, cars, or your faith, share your passion with your kids. It just might become their passion, too.

New Year, New Attitude!

2008-01-08T08:38:00.000-08:00

Your mom was right. Always say “please” and “thank you” – especially “thank you.” And, whether she realized it or not though, that seemingly insignificant act of saying “thank you” has far more impact than simply socially acceptable behavior.

We’re one week into a new year and it’s a great time to establish something in our homes that will sincerely affect the lives of every member our family. Thankfulness doesn’t just happen. It’s a choice we make and an attitude we cultivate, just like its opposite, ungratefulness. Then, as we make thankfulness a habit in our homes, it becomes not just a conditioned reflex, but a condition of the heart. Thankfulness prepares the way for worship. It causes unity to blossom. It yields peace and encourages fruitfulness. It forges courage and confidence and builds hope.

Here’s an idea you might want to initiate in your home. It works whether there’s one or one hundred and it just might change the whole atmosphere in your house. Post-it notes are a staple item at home and in the office. They come in all sizes and colors, and there’s just something about seeing them that just calls for action!

For this purpose, the small size post-it works just fine, and you should provide plenty of them for each family member in their own special color. Just write on each note one thing that you’re thankful for, and stick it on the refrigerator, the wall, the door or anywhere else that it’s sure to be seen. Don’t worry, they don’t harm the paint! And, don’t stop there. Keep being thankful and keep posting notes. Be thankful for people, for things, and for situations. Encourage everybody to participate, and if somebody seems a bit reluctant, start covering their bedroom door or walls with notes about why you’re thankful for them. It’s almost a sure thing that they’ll feel the need to join in. After about three or four days, collect them in an envelope and save them for a later time when everybody can sit down together and remember everything you were thankful for.

Here’s a twist that your family will enjoy. Select one family member as a special target. Take about 30 minutes and have everybody cover that person with post-its about why they’re thankful for them.

Sometimes it’s the simple things that make the biggest changes! May God bless your home with thankfulness in 2008!

Martha & Greg

That One Night

2007-12-24T09:09:00.000-08:00

It’s a wild, wild ride from Thanksgiving to Christmas, with so much to decorate, to buy, to wrap, to mail, to cook...and work, too! But tonight, those precious moments in firelight and candlelight round the Christmas tree, and tomorrow, when family and friends gather, will make it all worth it.
It’s all too easy for me, as the daughter of the original June Cleaver, to lose myself in recipes and shopping lists and details of the season, and sail right past the time to quiet my heart and think about what really happened to my life because of that baby born so long ago, His life already marked by the shadow of a cross, one that was meant for me.
I found that moment this morning, and thought I would share my thoughts with you. My prayer for us all today is that, once again, our hearts will be touched with the wonder of Emmanel, God With Us!

Martha

My computer screen glows
With instant information from
The other side of the world
While outside, bright against a black velvet sky
Stars sparkle, high and cold
A vague memory of the great star
That shown among them
That one night

Electric lights, at least 3,000
Creatively strung along tree and roof
Burn bravely
Our little attempt to recreate
Glory
That flooded a hillside
That one night

Muzak backgrounds
Of trumpets, harps and strings
Accompany shoppers thronging the malls
And sometimes
The whispering echo of ancient angels’ song stirs our hearts
For one brief moment with
Joy
That filled the earth
That one night

Now, we stop our schedules
And on this one night
Gather loved ones gladly
Round this lighted tree
And, looking back,
We welcome you
Sweet infant King
Knowing as wise men and shepherds could not know
The peace
The joy
The freedom
The redemption
That were born
With You
That one night

God Broke The Rules

2007-12-20T14:12:00.000-08:00

Every Christmas, I try to learn something new about the story of Jesus’ birth that will make it fresh and even more significant to me. That’s been a lot of years, for sure, but, without fail, I discover a new facet every time.

The measure of God’s love for us is a subject that seemingly has unending perspectives. This Christmas season, I realized something about that love that I never noticed before. God loves us so much that He broke the rules. I think within my concept of His holiness and goodness I had, until now, attributed some timidity to God’s personality that was really not there.

Now, before you label me some kind of heretic, you have to know that I understand completely that God can’t violate His character. He didn’t contradict who He was. It was our set of rules that he shattered when He sent His Son to earth.

Our rules stated that a virgin couldn’t conceive a child. It just didn’t happen like that. Our rules were that a King couldn’t be born in a stable. Our rules declared that once a Messiah did come to earth, He would surely be more forceful and demanding. Wouldn’t he take over and make things right immediately? Our rules would never allow the Son of God to die, especially on a torturous cross. But, if by some strange twist of fate, he did die, our rules pronounced that that was surely the end of it all.

But, God loves us too much to be contained by our trivial legalism. His ideas and plans are much deeper, much broader, much more brilliant that what we can fathom. So, he had to break through all our preconceived notions in order to rescue us from sin and from ourselves. Our rules are the things that contain Him, and prevent Him from doing what He wants in and through our lives.

In my Christmas reflections this year, I recalled attending a retreat at Mo Ranch in Hunt, Texas, over thirty years ago. One of the featured speakers was Dr. Lloyd Ogilvie, who, at the time, was pastor of Hollywood Presbyterian Church in California, and later served a number of years as Chaplain of the United States Senate. Dr. Ogilvie is a very distinguished individual with a resonant voice that, most certainly, must sound just like God’s. I have never forgotten one particular phrase that he spoke in that retreat session. He said, “If you knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that God could not fail, what would you set out to do for His Kingdom?”

Our words say one thing about God, but our rules might not bear that out. If I really understood and believed that God’s love for me was inexhaustible and that He stands behind that love with power that is immeasurable, how would I live my life differently?

In my search for something deeper and something more meaningful, that’s the challenge that God has placed before me this Christmas season. I want to begin acting like I really believe that God will not fail. I want to break the rules.

It's Like Living With A Celebrity

2007-12-12T05:26:00.000-08:00

I'm beginning to understand what it feels like to be Brad Pitt. There's very little I have in common with the guy, including the fact I've never been one of People magazine's Most Beautiful People. But, both of us definitely married "up."

A few weeks back, we were in Philadelphia, where Martha was honored as one of the country's top five journalism educators. Then, yesterday, all her school's principals and vice principals invaded her classroom with balloons, flowers and hoopla, and announced to her that the University of Texas had selected her as one of the Top Ten Teachers In Texas. There are over 300,000 teachers in this state, and she was chosen as one of the top of the heap!

It's especially satisfying for me to see Martha get this award, because I suppose I know more than anyone else all that she invests into her students. The time, the patience and the effort to teach them the skills to create excellent student publications are only the beginning. She's all about the kids. Martha sees a need for hope in today's kids' lives, and everything she does and says to them is focused on bringing that to them. Teaching is her calling, and God has, this year, rewarded her faithfulness to that mission. I'm really thankful to be her husband!

'Tis The Season...For Giving!

2007-11-28T12:22:00.001-08:00

A few weeks ago, we asked you to share with us ways that you’ve found to share God’s love as a family during the holiday season. We received so many great stories, and we thought it would be good to share a few of them with everyone.

“Something we do as a family to minister to others is making chicken soup! We shop for the ingredients together, prepare it and deliver it together. My mother did this, too, and I wanted to pass it along to my children. My mom used to make everything homemade, like bread, and dessert, too. Well, I still make the soup, but we buy the dessert and bread at Costco and I don't feel guilty in the least!”

This contribution was from someone who works with a ministry that organized this outreach to the needy...
“We asked churches to put together bags of hygiene products to give to local homeless shelters. The packets contained full size shampoo, bar of soap and soap dish, brush, comb, toothpaste, toothbrush, lotion and deodorant. The idea was that each ‘guest’ at a shelter could receive his or her own packet of products to clean up with. Each packet also contained a Bible and a package of underwear. We asked participants to buy the underwear in the size of the individual making the packet. We got many responses from parents who said that they had a wonderful time as a family shopping for the items for the packet, and how it impacted their children to put ‘child size’ underwear into those packets The kids would have an understanding that there were children their age and size that didn’t have a home or bed. Many said that they were planning to continue to do these packets on a quarterly basis, picking up a few items every time they went shopping and making the packets together as a family to take to the shelter!”

“Every year, my dad and I would participate in a soup kitchen together. At first, I was uneasy and uncertain, but I began to model his confidence and compassion and was able to focus on serving and those being served. Our whole family was part of a mass-assembly of thanksgiving dinner bags. We worked with several other families to make sure that each bag had a frozen turkey and all the necessary fixin's. Then, as a family, we would go out and present these ‘dinners in a bag’ to families identified through our church as being in need. We did this at Christmas, too, and took gifts along with the food.”

“We once had three Chinese international students from a local college over for Thanksgiving, and it was a great experience. International students really appreciate being part of a family for holidays. They are very curious about American home life and customs, but often don't have an opportunity to see the inside of an American home. It was also a great chance to expose our kids to another culture. Kids tend to build bridges quickly and make the whole experience much easier and more enjoyable for all.”

“Living near an Air Force base afforded us a unique opportunity to serve together as a family. During Thanksgiving and Christmas holidays, the base published a list of trainees that were available to visit the homes in the areas. These were very young men and women, most in their late teens and early twenties, who may have been away from home for the first time in their lives. They had been undergoing the rigors of basic training, but had time off during the holidays. Most of them were needing not only a nice home-cooked meal, but also the comfort and refreshment of spending some time in a family setting. We would pick them up at the base and bring them home with us. We all took special care to show them God’s love and our family’s appreciation for their service to our country.”

Here’s a family ministry that lasted far longer than just the holiday season...
“We discovered ‘houseparenting’. This is where a stable couple with their children moves onto a campus of 'children's homes' and lives in a group home with the children already there and becomes their foster family. Now, this decision did not come without a lot of prayer and guidance from the Lord and was definitely a life altering choice. But, after interviewing with several Christian organizations we discovered one nearby that we truly loved. We were offered the position after they interviewed us as a family. It required giving up our home, full time job and income, lifestyle, church family and most of our furnishings and moving into a very small 3 bedroom apartment attached to the cottage which would be the foster children's home. There were twelve boys living in the eight- bedroom cottage, all under the age of 12. And so our life as a full time foster family began. Our life revolved around a daily routine of waking at 6:00 am to prepare breakfast for seventeen, dressing them all for school, getting them on the bus and off to school. There were also regular visits with doctors, dentists, therapists, psychiatrists, and family visits with the foster children’s biological parents at times. After school there were scheduled activities to attend with the boys (in which our children were also involved), which included a 4-H program on the campus and animals to tend to, basketball games, karate classes, camps and field trips. We cooked dinner together and ate at 6:00 pm followed by clean up and mandatory study hall in the campus library or around the dinner table. Then, showers and bedtime and prayers were said at each bedside. We kissed our own children good night and quickly fell asleep to begin it all again the next day.”

“This family tradition was actually started in a large Sunday school class I taught (a singles class with over 2000 members, but average attendance of about 700...fun class), but it has become a standard for my family. I found a hole in my favorite sweater one icy Sunday morning while I was getting ready for church and the class I was to teach. I threw it away almost immediately, but then felt that I should take it with me to class. I thought there might be a message in finding a hole in my seven-year-old favorite sweater. I took it to the class, talked about the inconveniences and frustrations that enter our lives and told the class that I intended to give it to a homeless person when I left the church. Then I suggested, ‘Why don't you go home and find the coats that have shrunk due to darkness in your closet, meet me at Denny's for coffee and pie, and we can take all our coats to the homeless shelter.’ That afternoon, we delivered over 75 coats to the shelter, enjoyed coffee and pecan pie together and went home to our fireplaces and football games. Now that my sons are grown and live nearby, we often call them on cold days, invite them over for coffee and pie, suggest that they find the shrunken coats, theirs and the grandchildren's, and we deliver them to the shelter.”

We can’t teach our kids about giving with just words alone. They have to see that kind of Christ-like love and be a part of it. For all the people who shared their stories, giving became real and alive. That’s what makes it attractive to our families. Start a family tradition of giving this Christmas season!

The Spirit Of Giving

2007-11-28T07:16:00.001-08:00

I think, as a general rule, I tend to underestimate people. That realization came to me twice this past week, and the source of both revelations was an unlikely one – the public school system that we hear so many terrible things about.

Gilbert is a Bexar County juvenile probation officer whose job is to work within the schools to insure that troubled students stay on the straight-and-narrow. Actually, we’ve known Gilbert and his mom and dad and sister, Tara, more than twenty years now, back when he, himself, was just a kid. I can’t help it, but, to me, he’s still “Gibby”. As a probation officer, he’s doing a tremendous job touching teenagers’ lives, loving those unlovable ones, and being a no-nonsense voice of discipline for some kids who are in desperate need of structure in their lives. In visiting with these kids at school and in their homes, Gilbert noticed that many of them didn’t have coats to fend off the occasionally brutal blue northers that blow through South Texas. “It seemed like such a basic thing,” Gilbert told me. “But I realized that nobody had shown these kids enough love to even buy them a coat.” Starved for that love and attention, and lacking the stability that would make even the most humble house a home, these teens act out in socially unacceptable behavior.

But Gilbert has found a way to demonstrate his concern in a very practical way. He found a company that would sell him coats for $15. A probation officer with a wife and his own two little ones to support doesn’t have a lot of disposable income, but Gilbert and his family stretched their budget as far as possible to provide coats for the teens he is working with. But there was so much more that needed to be done. So, last week Gilbert started a movement.

He’s calling it “Got Your Back”, a reassuring reference to the support these kids need, as well as the coats he’s providing. His first order of business was to send an e-mail to all the faculty and staff at the high school, his alma mater, where Martha teaches and where Gilbert represents the Bexar County Probation Office. “I told them what I was doing,” he said, “and I couldn’t believe the response.” Within an hour, he had twenty pledges, and ten more before the day ended. The money was still rolling in yesterday when I spoke to him.

Annie, our daughter, teaches at a local middle school. Her husband, Robbie, is the youth pastor at Trinity Church, here in San Antonio. Last Christmas, the church youth group raised money to buy presents and throw a Christmas party for an orphanage in Nava, Mexico. I went with them, by the way, playing the role of Santa Claus. Annie teaches drama and she’s all about typecasting.

The trip to Mexico left such an impression on the kids from the church, that they have taken on that same task this year. The goal is to get every child in the orphanage a bicycle, something they all would love to have. Annie sent an e-mail to her fellow faculty members last week and informed them about the need, and the response was amazing. She called me up, with tears in her voice, to let me know that, by the end of the day, seven bicycles had been donated by her peers, and $200 had been collected. Since returning from the Thanksgiving holidays, the school is still buzzing about the opportunity, and even more has been pledged.

Those of us who consider ourselves "church people" may tend to get a little smug this time of the year. We become aware of so many opportunities for giving, and we’re moved to put forth a little effort to help out. That’s all very good. We pat ourselves on the back and reason that we’ve fulfilled our obligation for the year. But it’s no more than is happening in homes, schools, businesses and offices all over this country. Jesus never designated a certain season for giving. As Christ-followers, we need to expand our giving into a daily way of life. We need to set the example and lead the way, mirroring Jesus' heart for reaching out to others twelve months of the year.

Drinking From Wells We Didn't Dig

2007-11-16T11:10:00.000-08:00

If you’re suffering from a low level of patriotism, let me prescribe a generous dose of Philadelphia.

While Martha was collecting her accolades at all the dinners and the events last week at the National Journalism Educators convention, I managed to plot a schedule that would allow us to visit many of the historical sites in the City of Brotherly Love.

Equipped with some good walking shoes and warm coats to fend off temperatures in the low 30’s, we made our way through the streets of downtown Philadelphia into buildings that made history books come alive – Independence Hall, where our nation was born, Carpenter’s Hall where the First Continental Congress met in secret, Christ Church, which counted The Benjamin Franklin family and George and Martha Washington among its members, Betsy Ross’ home, and the City Tavern where the founding fathers met to discuss the day’s current events. Not one of these buildings, in itself, was impressive by its design or decor. They were small buildings, made up of small rooms. But big ideas found their roots there.

A flood of emotion surged through me as I considered the commitments that were made in those places. The signers of the Declaration of Independence promised that, “for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of Divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our lives, our fortunes, and our sacred honor.” And that was the price most of them had to pay in order to secure the liberty that we enjoy today.

Do we teach our kids today that there are some things worth giving everything, even our lives for? I read a speech by Christian sociologist and professor Tony Campolo that really made me think.

He said, “Here is what the Bible says, ‘And when the young no longer have dreams and the old no longer have visions, people perish.’ I spend most of my time on university campuses. Sometimes it upsets me because as I talk with the children, your children, they have no dreams—they have no visions. Let me tell what you have told them. You told them to be happy. ‘Mom, what do you think I ought to be?’ I ask any father, any mother. Every mother and father in America answers the same way. ‘I really don’t care as long as you’re happy.’ It kind of makes you sick, doesn’t it?"

There is something more important than possessions, status, or even happiness. That is the realization that life and liberty themselves are of the greatest value of all. We must teach our children that preserving those things that others have paid for is worth everything. The freedom that our founding fathers sacrificed to give us is priceless. And the salvation that Christ gave us through His own blood is worth everything.

“When God, your God, ushers you into the land he promised through your ancestors Abraham, Isaac, and Jacob to give you, you're going to walk into large, bustling cities you didn't build, well-furnished houses you didn't buy, come upon wells you didn't dig, vineyards and olive orchards you didn't plant. When you take it all in and settle down, pleased and content, make sure you don't forget how you got there—God brought you out of slavery in Egypt.”
Deuteronomy 6:10-12 (The Message)

When The Shepherds Were Almost Late To The Manger

2007-11-02T05:44:00.000-07:00

It's November already! It seems like we just put all the holiday decorations back in their place, and now it's time to drag them out again. At the Singletons' house, we do the holidays HUGE! We've been accused of Griswold-like enthusiasm when we decorate and celebrate the holidays, but we persevere despite the ridicule. Let the games begin.

We stumbled upon a family holiday tradition not long after we were blessed with kids in our home. Having purchased a beautiful ceramic nativity scene soon after we married, we intended that this would be the centerpiece of our Christmas decorations for the rest of our lives. It held a place of prominence on the living room coffee table. We weren't thinking like parents then. Not long after Annie began to toddle around the house, during the 1981 holiday season, her curious little hands were reaching out for the figures in the manger. We reasoned that "no-no" was an inappropriate connotation to associate with Baby Jesus, so we sought a solution. Thank God for Winn's. It was the venerable five-and-dime that had graced the South Texas area for generations, and, inside, they offered a wide assortment of cheap plastic nativity scenes that begged to be handled by kids. We bought a particularly inexpensive set, garishly painted before lead-based contents were a consideration. It took over the place of honor and the beautiful set was moved up to the mantel. Have at it, Annie!

After Matt made made his appearance in our home, we realized there was a way that we could include the nativity scene in our family's holiday worship. Each evening, before we put them to bed, the kids took the plastic figures and moved them along on a journey from their bedrooms to the living room. We read a portion of the Christmas story every night, until Christmas morning came, when all the participants at the nativity gathered at the manger. Baby Jesus, our Gift from God was wrapped in a beautiful package, and we would unwrap Him and place him in the stable. The whole family would sing carols and songs of worship and join together in prayers of thanksgiving, and it developed into a significant part of our holidays, even after the kids were grown. Beginning in their elementary school years, we began to give Annie and Matt responsibility for preparing part of that special family worship. And by the time they reached high school age, they began to lead the devotional times.

As beautiful and meaningful as this tradition was to our family, we would be remiss if we failed to admit that it didn't always go off without a hitch. One year, the shepherds almost didn't make it to the manger. Matt was about six, and, in his dedication to nightly find a new place for the shepherds to rest on their journey, they got lost. Night after night, as we prepared for the devotional time, Matt would search everywhere, to no avail. He fretted about the shepherds well-being and wondered aloud how we could have a nativity scene without them. Finally, there was a Christmas miracle at our house. On Christmas morning, as we settled down around the coffee table for a time of communion, Matt's eyes grew wide, and he jumped to his feet and ran toward the hallway. Hallelujah, the shepherds had arrived! Matt had decided at one point during the holiday season, that the heater closet was a great place for shepherds to spend the night, but it was such a safe hiding place that he forgot where he had put them. When he remembered their location, lo, there was great rejoicing.

What traditions have you had in your home? We'd like to know all the significant family times that you've established through the years during Thanksgiving and Christmas. You can share it here on the "comments" or send us an e-mail. Have a blessed holiday season!

WOOOOOHOOOOO!!!

2007-10-31T09:28:00.000-07:00

FINALLY! This is our first post to our new blog. We'll be sharing our thoughts here, and inviting you to join in the discussion. This is a community...a family. We're glad to have you here with us!